NOTES FROM THE FLAGSHIP
No. 16
SPIRITUAL GIFT MIX
As a young man growing up in the church we had “Revival Meetings” with a guest speaking during the week and on Sundays. My pastor father learned from his congregation the importance of having varying spiritual giftings of visiting preachers in the pulpit.
After one series of meetings some elders and deacons came to my father and said, “Pastor, we would rather have heard you preach this week.” My dad appreciated the complement but he immediately realized he’d invited another man with a pastoral gift very similar to his.” From then on the guest speakers were evangelists, teachers, and those with prophetic or healing gifts.
“I need someone to minister in the church that brings a different gifting then what God has given from me,” I heard my father say.
From this I learned the importance of having in the church or para church ministries a good gift mix of those on the ministry team and staff. Neither should certain gifts be elevated over others.
Romans 12:6 “We have different gifts according to the grace given us….”
In the discipleship of students at Teen Challenge I need a staff team with a good diversity of gift mix. For example, if I had every staff with the gift of mercy the students would take advantage of mercy and not be given proper discipline. If every staff had the gift of discernment the discipline might be too strong. If every staff member had the gift of leadership there might be a conflict of ideas, or too may cooks that would spoil the broth.
Paul and Barnabas are good examples. Barnabas was the encourager probably with the gift of mercy. Paul was a teacher, among his other giftings, and he exercised great discernment. The difference between them over John Mark was related directly to the difference in their God given giftings.
David had more discernment then Jonathan but they were a good team because of Jonathan’s love and mercy.
When a remnant of the Jews returned to Jerusalem from the Babylonian captivity 2 men with both similar and different giftings were used to rebuild spiritually and physically the peoples worship and work. Ezra was a man of faith who was also unwilling to compromise the truths taught in God’s Word as he lead the people in rebuilding the temple.. “For Ezra had devoted himself to the study and observance of the Law of the Lord, and to teaching its degrees and laws in Israel.” (Ezra 7:10 NIV)
It was Nehemiah who had the giftings of administration, organization, leadership and discernment to begin rebuilding the wall of Jerusalem against great opposition. When some politicians tried to stop the rebuilding project Nehemiah had the determination to stay on the wall and not come down to the level of his enemies. “Why should the work stop while leave it and come down to you?” (Nehemiah 6:3 NIV)
In interviewing prospective staff I always try and find the persons giftings; if they know what it is. Many do not! But a series of questions usually helps me discover their spiritual gift or giftings.
“The human body has many parts, but the many parts make up one body. So it is with the body of Christ…..Yes, the body has many different parts, not just one part.” I Corinthians 12:12, 14 Also see I Corinthians 12:27-31
A football team cannot have more then one quarterback. A basketball team that has 5 point guards would need to play with 5 basketballs. A church or ministry team needs the right mixture of spiritual giftings. “A spiritual gift is given to each of us as a means of helping the entire church.” I Corinthians 12:7
I have always referred to staff and workers under my leadership as being a “team.” It’s not a biblical word but it is a biblical principal. I am convinced that many staff issues and differences resulting in someone resigning and moving else where may be due to not recognizing that a church has a body with too many feet or too many hands or not enough of other body “parts.”
“Suppose the whole body were an eye---then how would they hear?” I Corinthians 12:17
If the “eye” represents the gift of discernment and the “ear” represents the gift of mercy (to show mercy one must be a good listener); for the church to have too many eyes without ears or vise verse can be a hindrance to spiritual growth of the whole body.
The purpose of the 5 fold gifts (Ephesians 4:11) is so that “we [the church] will be mature and full grown in the Lord, measuring up to the full stature of Christ.”
J.E. O’ Day in a small booklet I recommend entitled DISCOVERING YOUR SPIRITUAL GIFTS (Intervarsity Press) writes:
“Christians sometimes fall short in actually using their gifts. Many are standing on first base when instead they need to be running the bases. One reason is they are unaware of their spiritual gifts.”
O’Day suggests that a church or ministry might do well to take an inventory of its full-time and volunteer workers in respect to their spiritual gift or gifts (we usually have more then one gift).
I do instruct workers that sometimes of necessity they might have to serve in a position for which they do not have the primary gifting for the task; but to serve there until a person comes along with the right gift for the right task or office.
However, the greatest joy and success in service for the Lord is when the use of gifts matches the task.
When Timothy might have gotten discouraged by the challenges he faced with leading the church at Ephesus (backsliding, false teaching,) twice Paul reminded young Timothy to remember his pastoral giftings that accompanied his calling: “Wherefore I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in thee by the putting on of my hands. “ (II Timothy 1:6 KJV) Timothy had the gift of pastor/teacher.
Also in I Timothy 1:18 Paul charged his son in the faith to remember prophesies given him as he was launched into ministry; no doubt referring to the time of Paul laying hands on him in what we would today call an ordination service. Paul said “by them…fight a good warfare.” I believe the word “them” is referring to Timothy’s spiritual gifts. The Holy Spirits gifts are the “enabling gifts” to carry on the work of God.
Every believer has a spiritual gift. They need to know, or be taught, what it is and helped to use it. Leaders need to be like a coach or manager placing believers as much is possible within the body for the edifying of the church and the ministry.
“The gifts are not in any way confined to the elders or to any other group separated from the rest of the congregation. It is high time that the church today got back to the New Testament and asked serious questions about their understanding of ordination to the ministry, which in practice tends to confine most forms of ministry to a limited group of ordained people. God doesn’t appear to be bound by such limits in bestowing his gifts.” (I Peter New Testament Commentary by I. Howard Marshall)
As a young man growing up in the church we had “Revival Meetings” with a guest speaking during the week and on Sundays. My pastor father learned from his congregation the importance of having varying spiritual giftings of visiting preachers in the pulpit.
After one series of meetings some elders and deacons came to my father and said, “Pastor, we would rather have heard you preach this week.” My dad appreciated the complement but he immediately realized he’d invited another man with a pastoral gift very similar to his.” From then on the guest speakers were evangelists, teachers, and those with prophetic or healing gifts.
“I need someone to minister in the church that brings a different gifting then what God has given from me,” I heard my father say.
From this I learned the importance of having in the church or para church ministries a good gift mix of those on the ministry team and staff. Neither should certain gifts be elevated over others.
Romans 12:6 “We have different gifts according to the grace given us….”
In the discipleship of students at Teen Challenge I need a staff team with a good diversity of gift mix. For example, if I had every staff with the gift of mercy the students would take advantage of mercy and not be given proper discipline. If every staff had the gift of discernment the discipline might be too strong. If every staff member had the gift of leadership there might be a conflict of ideas, or too may cooks that would spoil the broth.
Paul and Barnabas are good examples. Barnabas was the encourager probably with the gift of mercy. Paul was a teacher, among his other giftings, and he exercised great discernment. The difference between them over John Mark was related directly to the difference in their God given giftings.
David had more discernment then Jonathan but they were a good team because of Jonathan’s love and mercy.
When a remnant of the Jews returned to Jerusalem from the Babylonian captivity 2 men with both similar and different giftings were used to rebuild spiritually and physically the peoples worship and work. Ezra was a man of faith who was also unwilling to compromise the truths taught in God’s Word as he lead the people in rebuilding the temple.. “For Ezra had devoted himself to the study and observance of the Law of the Lord, and to teaching its degrees and laws in Israel.” (Ezra 7:10 NIV)
It was Nehemiah who had the giftings of administration, organization, leadership and discernment to begin rebuilding the wall of Jerusalem against great opposition. When some politicians tried to stop the rebuilding project Nehemiah had the determination to stay on the wall and not come down to the level of his enemies. “Why should the work stop while leave it and come down to you?” (Nehemiah 6:3 NIV)
In interviewing prospective staff I always try and find the persons giftings; if they know what it is. Many do not! But a series of questions usually helps me discover their spiritual gift or giftings.
“The human body has many parts, but the many parts make up one body. So it is with the body of Christ…..Yes, the body has many different parts, not just one part.” I Corinthians 12:12, 14 Also see I Corinthians 12:27-31
A football team cannot have more then one quarterback. A basketball team that has 5 point guards would need to play with 5 basketballs. A church or ministry team needs the right mixture of spiritual giftings. “A spiritual gift is given to each of us as a means of helping the entire church.” I Corinthians 12:7
I have always referred to staff and workers under my leadership as being a “team.” It’s not a biblical word but it is a biblical principal. I am convinced that many staff issues and differences resulting in someone resigning and moving else where may be due to not recognizing that a church has a body with too many feet or too many hands or not enough of other body “parts.”
“Suppose the whole body were an eye---then how would they hear?” I Corinthians 12:17
If the “eye” represents the gift of discernment and the “ear” represents the gift of mercy (to show mercy one must be a good listener); for the church to have too many eyes without ears or vise verse can be a hindrance to spiritual growth of the whole body.
The purpose of the 5 fold gifts (Ephesians 4:11) is so that “we [the church] will be mature and full grown in the Lord, measuring up to the full stature of Christ.”
J.E. O’ Day in a small booklet I recommend entitled DISCOVERING YOUR SPIRITUAL GIFTS (Intervarsity Press) writes:
“Christians sometimes fall short in actually using their gifts. Many are standing on first base when instead they need to be running the bases. One reason is they are unaware of their spiritual gifts.”
O’Day suggests that a church or ministry might do well to take an inventory of its full-time and volunteer workers in respect to their spiritual gift or gifts (we usually have more then one gift).
I do instruct workers that sometimes of necessity they might have to serve in a position for which they do not have the primary gifting for the task; but to serve there until a person comes along with the right gift for the right task or office.
However, the greatest joy and success in service for the Lord is when the use of gifts matches the task.
When Timothy might have gotten discouraged by the challenges he faced with leading the church at Ephesus (backsliding, false teaching,) twice Paul reminded young Timothy to remember his pastoral giftings that accompanied his calling: “Wherefore I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in thee by the putting on of my hands. “ (II Timothy 1:6 KJV) Timothy had the gift of pastor/teacher.
Also in I Timothy 1:18 Paul charged his son in the faith to remember prophesies given him as he was launched into ministry; no doubt referring to the time of Paul laying hands on him in what we would today call an ordination service. Paul said “by them…fight a good warfare.” I believe the word “them” is referring to Timothy’s spiritual gifts. The Holy Spirits gifts are the “enabling gifts” to carry on the work of God.
Every believer has a spiritual gift. They need to know, or be taught, what it is and helped to use it. Leaders need to be like a coach or manager placing believers as much is possible within the body for the edifying of the church and the ministry.
“The gifts are not in any way confined to the elders or to any other group separated from the rest of the congregation. It is high time that the church today got back to the New Testament and asked serious questions about their understanding of ordination to the ministry, which in practice tends to confine most forms of ministry to a limited group of ordained people. God doesn’t appear to be bound by such limits in bestowing his gifts.” (I Peter New Testament Commentary by I. Howard Marshall)
No. 15
THE UNTITLED LEADER
“In your kingdom, will you let my sons sit in places of honor next to you, one at your right hand and the other at your left?” (Matthew 20:21)
I have never liked titles for myself, although I realize they’re necessary. I have held titles such as Reverend, Pastor, Director, Executive Director and President. However I always knew that whatever my title it did not define me. My favorite titles, if I had to choose, are Christian, husband, father and now in my later years my favorite is “pop pop” (grandfather).
Titles are important especially when whoever holds it fulfills the function and role behind the title. Apostle defended vigorously his title of “Apostle.” (I Corinthians 9:1-2) However, most often he simply called himself a “servant/slave of Jesus Christ.”
Not everyone has a title or needs one.
Some of my best workers never held an official title.
The only time the word addicted is used in the Bible (King James Version) is I Corinthians 16:15 when Paul talks about the house of Stephanas that “They have addicted themselves to the ministry of the saints.” Paul mentions no titles in association with their names; though they may have had titles. Paul went on to say about those in this house church that they should be given “proper honor” because they served so well. (I Corinthians 15:18)
I do not find in the Bible any title for Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, (though they are referred to as patriarchs) Moses, Aaron and many, many others.
Mark Sanford in his book entitled YOU DON’T NEED A TITLE TO BE A LEADER tells of an organization that needed someone to head up an import project. She was told they could not make her a “Director” of the project. She responded by saying, “tat’s alright. I don’t need a title to be a leader.”
Right now as I write this there is a big controversy in the New York City public school system as to how to get rid of ineffective teachers. Apparently calling the title “Teacher” does not automatically make one a true teacher from whom students can actually learn.
Some of my best teachers never held the title of Teacher.
Paul in Romans 16 mentions some untitled people that helped him in the work of God. He refers to them as saints, helpers, kinsman, chosen, workfellow host, and brother. Perhaps some of these did have official titles but Paul identify them by relationship and not by position or title.
John Maxwell defines a leader as someone with positive influence. Some of the leaders (note the small “l”) I have worked with and have been with people of influence as intercessors, prayer warriors, financial givers, servants with the gift of helps, encouragers, peace makers, and connectors. The latter are those who know how to bring people together. These are the behind-the-scene, back stage people that make it possible for those who are upfront leaders with titles fulfill God’s calling of the church and or ministry. These are people who define what humility is: “It isn’t thinking less of your self. It is thinking of your self less.”
In some cultures titles are very important. If the title holder fulfills the job description associated with the title this is good; but some merely want to have a title for the prestige that goes with it. We don’t know what title the mother of Zebedee’s sons had in mind when she asked Jesus if when he came into power that one son could sit at his right hand and the other at his left: maybe one wanted to be Vice-President and the other Secretary of State. It was both position and title that James and John sought.
It can be a mistake to give some people a title for they take it far too serious and become entrenched in their position and try to wield control over others just because of their title. And, I have seen foot soldiers via for a position that carries a title they covet, and end up under minding a leader.
Many a pastor has been given great stress from a deacon that through his or her title and position entitled them to control the pastor and the church. Similarly I have seen Para church organizations have Board Members that felt their role was to keep their leader in check rather then help facilitate his vision. Pastors and leaders need accountability but they do not need undue scrutiny.
It’s the untitled people that bless churches and organizations by their selfless service. Most of them could care less about a title—they just want to get a job done.
Some of the great people of influence that have made huge differences in society and in humanitarian and evangelistic impacts are not known by their title, though they had one. The name Billy Graham will always be associated with soul winning and evangelism. Mother Theresa was a nun of a Catholic Sisterhood order but the term “Mother” defines her as someone who cared for the poor and suffering. Martin Luther King led a movement against prejudice and racism. He was a Reverend and Doctor but no title is necessary to characterize his influence.
“It’s impossible for a title or an organizational chart to reflect all the many people who act as leaders or exert leadership throughout the organization. That is why I call such people “nontitled leaders.” They may or may not have direct responsibility to lead others, yet every day they influence and lead those around them.”
“The bottom line is, influence and inspiration come from the person, not the position.” (Mark Sanford)
Consider some unknown persons in the Bible that God used: (1) The servant girl that influenced Naaman, commander of King Aram’s army to go to Elisha to seek healing for his leprosy. (2) The lad with a lunch that fed 5,000—he was the right person, in the right place at the right time. I have had hundreds of such people help further the work of God just like that lad. (3) A Samaritan women simply known as “the women at the well” brought a whole village of men to Christ. (4) The Inn Keeper that gave Mary and Joseph a stable for a place for the Christ child to be born. (5) The Inn Keeper that took in the man brought to him by the Good Samaritan. And many more! Each of them had either influence or something to give to God for it to be used for the work of God.
Paul wrote some very strong admonitions to the church at Corinth. But it also was a church with those with a servant’s heart. He commended them for how they refresh Titus’ spirit. “He [brought the news to Paul] of the encouragement he received from you…and how loyal is your love for me. I was filled with joy.” (2 Corinthians 7: 5-16) These are the kind of untitled people and leaders all churches and ministries need. Whether the believers Paul talks about were churches Leaders or leaders we don’t know, but no church or ministry can succeed without them.
I once heard the late John Wimber, founder of the Vineyard Churches, say that an elder is someone who “elds.” He said, ‘look around the church and see those who people go to for prayer, counsel and advice.” He called that “eld-ing.” I call such people the untitled leaders of the church.
Here are some characteristics of untitled leaders:
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
“In your kingdom, will you let my sons sit in places of honor next to you, one at your right hand and the other at your left?” (Matthew 20:21)
I have never liked titles for myself, although I realize they’re necessary. I have held titles such as Reverend, Pastor, Director, Executive Director and President. However I always knew that whatever my title it did not define me. My favorite titles, if I had to choose, are Christian, husband, father and now in my later years my favorite is “pop pop” (grandfather).
Titles are important especially when whoever holds it fulfills the function and role behind the title. Apostle defended vigorously his title of “Apostle.” (I Corinthians 9:1-2) However, most often he simply called himself a “servant/slave of Jesus Christ.”
Not everyone has a title or needs one.
Some of my best workers never held an official title.
The only time the word addicted is used in the Bible (King James Version) is I Corinthians 16:15 when Paul talks about the house of Stephanas that “They have addicted themselves to the ministry of the saints.” Paul mentions no titles in association with their names; though they may have had titles. Paul went on to say about those in this house church that they should be given “proper honor” because they served so well. (I Corinthians 15:18)
I do not find in the Bible any title for Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, (though they are referred to as patriarchs) Moses, Aaron and many, many others.
Mark Sanford in his book entitled YOU DON’T NEED A TITLE TO BE A LEADER tells of an organization that needed someone to head up an import project. She was told they could not make her a “Director” of the project. She responded by saying, “tat’s alright. I don’t need a title to be a leader.”
Right now as I write this there is a big controversy in the New York City public school system as to how to get rid of ineffective teachers. Apparently calling the title “Teacher” does not automatically make one a true teacher from whom students can actually learn.
Some of my best teachers never held the title of Teacher.
Paul in Romans 16 mentions some untitled people that helped him in the work of God. He refers to them as saints, helpers, kinsman, chosen, workfellow host, and brother. Perhaps some of these did have official titles but Paul identify them by relationship and not by position or title.
John Maxwell defines a leader as someone with positive influence. Some of the leaders (note the small “l”) I have worked with and have been with people of influence as intercessors, prayer warriors, financial givers, servants with the gift of helps, encouragers, peace makers, and connectors. The latter are those who know how to bring people together. These are the behind-the-scene, back stage people that make it possible for those who are upfront leaders with titles fulfill God’s calling of the church and or ministry. These are people who define what humility is: “It isn’t thinking less of your self. It is thinking of your self less.”
In some cultures titles are very important. If the title holder fulfills the job description associated with the title this is good; but some merely want to have a title for the prestige that goes with it. We don’t know what title the mother of Zebedee’s sons had in mind when she asked Jesus if when he came into power that one son could sit at his right hand and the other at his left: maybe one wanted to be Vice-President and the other Secretary of State. It was both position and title that James and John sought.
It can be a mistake to give some people a title for they take it far too serious and become entrenched in their position and try to wield control over others just because of their title. And, I have seen foot soldiers via for a position that carries a title they covet, and end up under minding a leader.
Many a pastor has been given great stress from a deacon that through his or her title and position entitled them to control the pastor and the church. Similarly I have seen Para church organizations have Board Members that felt their role was to keep their leader in check rather then help facilitate his vision. Pastors and leaders need accountability but they do not need undue scrutiny.
It’s the untitled people that bless churches and organizations by their selfless service. Most of them could care less about a title—they just want to get a job done.
Some of the great people of influence that have made huge differences in society and in humanitarian and evangelistic impacts are not known by their title, though they had one. The name Billy Graham will always be associated with soul winning and evangelism. Mother Theresa was a nun of a Catholic Sisterhood order but the term “Mother” defines her as someone who cared for the poor and suffering. Martin Luther King led a movement against prejudice and racism. He was a Reverend and Doctor but no title is necessary to characterize his influence.
“It’s impossible for a title or an organizational chart to reflect all the many people who act as leaders or exert leadership throughout the organization. That is why I call such people “nontitled leaders.” They may or may not have direct responsibility to lead others, yet every day they influence and lead those around them.”
“The bottom line is, influence and inspiration come from the person, not the position.” (Mark Sanford)
Consider some unknown persons in the Bible that God used: (1) The servant girl that influenced Naaman, commander of King Aram’s army to go to Elisha to seek healing for his leprosy. (2) The lad with a lunch that fed 5,000—he was the right person, in the right place at the right time. I have had hundreds of such people help further the work of God just like that lad. (3) A Samaritan women simply known as “the women at the well” brought a whole village of men to Christ. (4) The Inn Keeper that gave Mary and Joseph a stable for a place for the Christ child to be born. (5) The Inn Keeper that took in the man brought to him by the Good Samaritan. And many more! Each of them had either influence or something to give to God for it to be used for the work of God.
Paul wrote some very strong admonitions to the church at Corinth. But it also was a church with those with a servant’s heart. He commended them for how they refresh Titus’ spirit. “He [brought the news to Paul] of the encouragement he received from you…and how loyal is your love for me. I was filled with joy.” (2 Corinthians 7: 5-16) These are the kind of untitled people and leaders all churches and ministries need. Whether the believers Paul talks about were churches Leaders or leaders we don’t know, but no church or ministry can succeed without them.
I once heard the late John Wimber, founder of the Vineyard Churches, say that an elder is someone who “elds.” He said, ‘look around the church and see those who people go to for prayer, counsel and advice.” He called that “eld-ing.” I call such people the untitled leaders of the church.
Here are some characteristics of untitled leaders:
- They see the small stuff that needs done.
- They are great encouragers.
- They do what they do regardless of appreciation shown to them.
- They don’t wait to be told to do something—they just do it.
- They like to come along side the titled leaders to help him, or her, to fulfill their calling.
- Some work best alone but others are good at motivating others to get involved with them.
- They tactfully show titled leaders where they might have a blind spot.
- They are generally very loyal.
- They’re consistent and faithful.
- They work without needing words of appreciation (though they should be given it).
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
No 14
THE USE AND MISUSE OF INFORMATION
“My son, pay attention to my wisdom; listen carefully to my wise counsel. Then you will learn to be discreet and will store up knowledge.” (Proverbs 5:1-2)
A leader often has privileged information and has to be selective as to who and when it should be shared. Information can be a blessing or a curse and the wise use of it is vital in any church, organization and ministry. Over the years I have knowledge and information of individuals that will go to the grave with me.
I am faced on a weekly basic whether to share certain information with my staff and co-workers in ministry. Information can be gossip or gospel. It can be instructive or destructive. Some people collect bad information like garbage and like to throw it around. Many a pastor, leader or worker has been hurt when information that should have been deleted (from the memory computer) or kept private but was instead passed along to others.
Information filtered through others then passed along often is tainted, distorted or ends up an outright falsehood.
President Ronald Regan during the cold war when negotiating nuclear weapons treaty’s with the Soviet Union had an expression that ought to be followed in the church and ministry: Trust but verify.
Leader’s sources of information are not always accurate. I have mistakenly taken action at times that turned out to be the wrong decision because I trusted the source of the information but did not verify it with another source. “In a multitude of counselors there is wisdom” and usually better information.
I also have found that sharing vision for the ministry to the wrong person can be either misunderstood or too overwhelming. Visionaries tend to think everyone should be as enthused over their vision as they are. Would you tell an 8 or 10 year old what you might tell a peer? The same holds true for spiritual children---they may be unable to understand futurist plans and visions that might ultimately involve them but don’t need to know about it until steps are implemented to work the vision.
“Joseph has a dream, and when he told it to his brother’s, they hated him all the more.” (Genesis 37:5 NIV)
When the children of Israel marched around Jericho they were given instructions on a need-to-know basis. Joshua told them on day one of the march: “Do not give a war cry, do not raise your voices, do not say a word until the day I tell you to shout. Then Shout!” (Joshua 6:10)
I see too much shouting too soon in gospel work and in spiritual warfare. As a result information can leak out too soon and someone tries to sabotage it.
Information is knowledge and knowledge is power. It can do good or do evil. Unverified information can be gossip and some people thrive on gossip. Sometimes gossip does not need to be evil---there’s a lot of truth that should not be passed around. The difference between gossip and news is whether you hear it or tell it.
“The things that go in one ear and out the other do not hurt as much as the things that go in one ear, get mixed up, and then slip out of the mouth.” (THE SPEAKER’S QUOTE BOOK)
Another aspect of information is the necessity, at times, of dispensing right information to the right persons. Withholding information can be as harmful as sharing the wrong information or gossip. Abraham withheld information that Sarah was his wife and God had to tell Abimelech in a dream not to touch her. (Genesis 20)
‘Why didn’t someone tell me’ is not an infrequent thought that goes through my mind; especially when I have to deal with a situation when I do not have all the information in hand to make a timely and accurate decision. Withheld information by lay people and ministry staff often blindsides a leader.
Young Samuel was tested early on in his calling. The Lord told him something that “will make the ears of everyone who hears of it tingle.” (I Samuel 3:11-21) This had to do with judgment coming on Eli, the priest, for not disciplining his sons who were treating the temple sacrifices and offering with contempt.( I Samuel 2:12-26)
Later Eli knew the Word of the Lord had come to young Samuel and Eli asked him to share it: “So Samuel told him everything, hiding nothing from him.” Eli accepted the verdict saying, “He is the Lord; let him do what is good in his eyes.” (I Samuel 3: 18) It took courage for Samuel to share such a heavy message with his pastor; and it took discipline to withhold it until the time was right.
Some people thrive on having certain knowledge others do not have and pridefully flaunt it; perhaps sharing some tidbits but then withholding other information. Yet others babble everything they know to make themselves feel important. “Wise people treasure knowledge, but the babbling of a fool invites trouble.” (Proverbs 10:14)
There is an ancient saying” Have you heard a word against your neighbor? Let it die within you, trusting it will not burst you.”
Some things should be pondered in our hearts and minds before sharing it. “But Mary quietly treasured these things in her heart and thought about them often.” (Luke 2:19) Jesus withheld information from his disciples until they were ready to handle it. “You don’t understand now why I am doing it, someday you will.” (John 13:7).
God is too good to give us answers to some prayers we pray because we are not prepared to handle such blessings. God is also too good to give us knowledge that is too high for us and when such knowledge would cause us either fear or pride. Leaders should follow Christ’s example in how he shared and communicated with his disciples.
When sharing vision it is not good to blow an uncertain trumpet but it’s also not good to blow it too soon. Wait until the crowd has fallen in line behind.
The successful leader is one who makes the right move at the right moment with the right motive and with having shared the right information in the process.
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
“My son, pay attention to my wisdom; listen carefully to my wise counsel. Then you will learn to be discreet and will store up knowledge.” (Proverbs 5:1-2)
A leader often has privileged information and has to be selective as to who and when it should be shared. Information can be a blessing or a curse and the wise use of it is vital in any church, organization and ministry. Over the years I have knowledge and information of individuals that will go to the grave with me.
I am faced on a weekly basic whether to share certain information with my staff and co-workers in ministry. Information can be gossip or gospel. It can be instructive or destructive. Some people collect bad information like garbage and like to throw it around. Many a pastor, leader or worker has been hurt when information that should have been deleted (from the memory computer) or kept private but was instead passed along to others.
Information filtered through others then passed along often is tainted, distorted or ends up an outright falsehood.
President Ronald Regan during the cold war when negotiating nuclear weapons treaty’s with the Soviet Union had an expression that ought to be followed in the church and ministry: Trust but verify.
Leader’s sources of information are not always accurate. I have mistakenly taken action at times that turned out to be the wrong decision because I trusted the source of the information but did not verify it with another source. “In a multitude of counselors there is wisdom” and usually better information.
I also have found that sharing vision for the ministry to the wrong person can be either misunderstood or too overwhelming. Visionaries tend to think everyone should be as enthused over their vision as they are. Would you tell an 8 or 10 year old what you might tell a peer? The same holds true for spiritual children---they may be unable to understand futurist plans and visions that might ultimately involve them but don’t need to know about it until steps are implemented to work the vision.
“Joseph has a dream, and when he told it to his brother’s, they hated him all the more.” (Genesis 37:5 NIV)
When the children of Israel marched around Jericho they were given instructions on a need-to-know basis. Joshua told them on day one of the march: “Do not give a war cry, do not raise your voices, do not say a word until the day I tell you to shout. Then Shout!” (Joshua 6:10)
I see too much shouting too soon in gospel work and in spiritual warfare. As a result information can leak out too soon and someone tries to sabotage it.
Information is knowledge and knowledge is power. It can do good or do evil. Unverified information can be gossip and some people thrive on gossip. Sometimes gossip does not need to be evil---there’s a lot of truth that should not be passed around. The difference between gossip and news is whether you hear it or tell it.
“The things that go in one ear and out the other do not hurt as much as the things that go in one ear, get mixed up, and then slip out of the mouth.” (THE SPEAKER’S QUOTE BOOK)
Another aspect of information is the necessity, at times, of dispensing right information to the right persons. Withholding information can be as harmful as sharing the wrong information or gossip. Abraham withheld information that Sarah was his wife and God had to tell Abimelech in a dream not to touch her. (Genesis 20)
‘Why didn’t someone tell me’ is not an infrequent thought that goes through my mind; especially when I have to deal with a situation when I do not have all the information in hand to make a timely and accurate decision. Withheld information by lay people and ministry staff often blindsides a leader.
Young Samuel was tested early on in his calling. The Lord told him something that “will make the ears of everyone who hears of it tingle.” (I Samuel 3:11-21) This had to do with judgment coming on Eli, the priest, for not disciplining his sons who were treating the temple sacrifices and offering with contempt.( I Samuel 2:12-26)
Later Eli knew the Word of the Lord had come to young Samuel and Eli asked him to share it: “So Samuel told him everything, hiding nothing from him.” Eli accepted the verdict saying, “He is the Lord; let him do what is good in his eyes.” (I Samuel 3: 18) It took courage for Samuel to share such a heavy message with his pastor; and it took discipline to withhold it until the time was right.
Some people thrive on having certain knowledge others do not have and pridefully flaunt it; perhaps sharing some tidbits but then withholding other information. Yet others babble everything they know to make themselves feel important. “Wise people treasure knowledge, but the babbling of a fool invites trouble.” (Proverbs 10:14)
There is an ancient saying” Have you heard a word against your neighbor? Let it die within you, trusting it will not burst you.”
Some things should be pondered in our hearts and minds before sharing it. “But Mary quietly treasured these things in her heart and thought about them often.” (Luke 2:19) Jesus withheld information from his disciples until they were ready to handle it. “You don’t understand now why I am doing it, someday you will.” (John 13:7).
God is too good to give us answers to some prayers we pray because we are not prepared to handle such blessings. God is also too good to give us knowledge that is too high for us and when such knowledge would cause us either fear or pride. Leaders should follow Christ’s example in how he shared and communicated with his disciples.
When sharing vision it is not good to blow an uncertain trumpet but it’s also not good to blow it too soon. Wait until the crowd has fallen in line behind.
The successful leader is one who makes the right move at the right moment with the right motive and with having shared the right information in the process.
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
No 13
THE ECONOMICS OF SALVATION
For this is what the Lord says: “You were sold for nothing, and without money you will be redeemed.”
(Isaiah 52:3)
I watched our Teen Challenge choir singing on one occasion and decided to do a quick calculation. There were 24 members of the choir. Based on past knowledge of drug addicts and alcoholics I estimated the total number of years the 24 had spent on drugs and came up with the figure of 250 years.
Next I estimated the years they had spent in prison and came up with an unscientific figure of 75.
Then I wondered how much money tax payers had spent to pay for their prison time and hospital visits to get detoxified. I came up with a very conservative figure of 1.8 million dollars.
After the choir sang I had to go speak and share about the ministry of Teen Challenge and in the course of my message I mentioned the above figures. Then I said “Jesus Saves” and let the words sink in for a moment. Finally the audience got the point and clapped
I had just arrived at a very important aspect of salvation that we rarely think about; that is the Economics of Salvation.
I also said, “As you saw those 24 members of the choir I want you to realize that the government and the tax payer is no longer spending money for their incarceration, medical treatment from the adverse effects of drugs and alcohol; and not to say calculating the money saved from those who once robbed or stole to support their addiction but are no longer doing so.
Then I smiled and said, “I think I’m going to send the government a bill for Jesus’ services. “Jesus saves” is not just a theological statement—it’s an economic statement as well.
Salvation is free but its effects create the saving of lives and saving of money.
Smoking, drinking and gambling---if one did all three---can put a deep hole in a monthly budget. Sin is expensive. I realize that non-smokers and non-drinkers can waste money on other acceptable pleasures that a Christian might spend their money on to enjoy. This too is not good stewardship but generally speaking a true biblical Christian enjoys the economic blessing when not supporting a smoking habit or from abusing alcohol or indulging in other vices.
“In the house of the wise are stores of choice food and oil, but a foolish man devours all he has. He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honor.” (Proverbs 21:20-21 NLT)
I have witnessed the spiritual, physical and financial loss that comes from bad habits. The costs to society and the tax payer from the adverse effects of smoking along are enormous. Add to that the hidden costs of absenteeism at work; as well as accidents, theft, and medical costs of those that abuse drugs and/or alcohol in the workplace.
The taxes added to tobacco and alcohol is often called a “sin tax.” In no way do they cover the true costs of the adverse effects on such so-called pleasures.
Proverbs 21:17 says, “He who loves pleasure will become poor; whoever loves wine and oil will never be rich.
Proverbs 23:19-21 has a similar warning: “Listen, my son, and be wise, and keep your heart on the right path. Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rages.”
As our national debt sours higher and higher like an out of control heroin and cocaine addict I wonder what a national spiritual awakening might do to save our spiraling health care costs and other costs from a lifestyle of sin. One person that quits smoking can save approximately 60 dollars a month and more dollars if not drinking alcohol. Other doctor, medicine and health related savings may be difficult to estimate but the reality is that Jesus can and does “save” us in more ways then one.
On a personal level, believers save money if they abstain from the world’s vices. This is a principal taught throughout the Scriptures.
Consider what might be a lifetime of savings it would be if the smoker and drinker put that same amount of money in a savings account to leave an inheritance to grandchildren. (Proverbs 13:22)
“The blessing of the Lord brings wealth, and he adds no trouble to it.” (Proverbs 10:22)
“He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honor.” (Proverbs 21:21)
“The house of the righteous contains great treasure, but the income of the wicked brings trouble.” (Proverbs 15:6) One trouble that often comes is bad health.
A godly lifestyle is an investment for eternity as well as good financial budgeting. Jesus saves souls and saves lives and He can help us save money in ways you may have never considered.
Of all the teachings and sermons I have ever heard that has to do with the improper use of money no one points out that a godly lifestyle is rewarded in financial saving as well as soul saving.
Proverbs 13:22 is a promise that is fulfilled in the ‘economics of salvation:’ “Good people leave an inheritance to their grandchildren, but the sinner’s wealth passes to the godly.”
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
After reading the Flagship Notes that my assistant edited, she responded with:
This is brilliant… being a sinner is so expensive! I can’t even begin to tell you how much money is down the drain because of my addiction. Lawyers, Police, Fines, Drugs, Paraphernalia, Cigarettes, Car crashes, Stealing from family, Stealing from Banks, Stealing from the Lord at a church…I could go on and on…But when Jesus saves- He saves our souls, but He also saves our bank accounts. Now, if I could only learn how to be a better steward, lol J
Great Flagship Notes!
-Mariah Tramonto
For this is what the Lord says: “You were sold for nothing, and without money you will be redeemed.”
(Isaiah 52:3)
I watched our Teen Challenge choir singing on one occasion and decided to do a quick calculation. There were 24 members of the choir. Based on past knowledge of drug addicts and alcoholics I estimated the total number of years the 24 had spent on drugs and came up with the figure of 250 years.
Next I estimated the years they had spent in prison and came up with an unscientific figure of 75.
Then I wondered how much money tax payers had spent to pay for their prison time and hospital visits to get detoxified. I came up with a very conservative figure of 1.8 million dollars.
After the choir sang I had to go speak and share about the ministry of Teen Challenge and in the course of my message I mentioned the above figures. Then I said “Jesus Saves” and let the words sink in for a moment. Finally the audience got the point and clapped
I had just arrived at a very important aspect of salvation that we rarely think about; that is the Economics of Salvation.
I also said, “As you saw those 24 members of the choir I want you to realize that the government and the tax payer is no longer spending money for their incarceration, medical treatment from the adverse effects of drugs and alcohol; and not to say calculating the money saved from those who once robbed or stole to support their addiction but are no longer doing so.
Then I smiled and said, “I think I’m going to send the government a bill for Jesus’ services. “Jesus saves” is not just a theological statement—it’s an economic statement as well.
Salvation is free but its effects create the saving of lives and saving of money.
Smoking, drinking and gambling---if one did all three---can put a deep hole in a monthly budget. Sin is expensive. I realize that non-smokers and non-drinkers can waste money on other acceptable pleasures that a Christian might spend their money on to enjoy. This too is not good stewardship but generally speaking a true biblical Christian enjoys the economic blessing when not supporting a smoking habit or from abusing alcohol or indulging in other vices.
“In the house of the wise are stores of choice food and oil, but a foolish man devours all he has. He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honor.” (Proverbs 21:20-21 NLT)
I have witnessed the spiritual, physical and financial loss that comes from bad habits. The costs to society and the tax payer from the adverse effects of smoking along are enormous. Add to that the hidden costs of absenteeism at work; as well as accidents, theft, and medical costs of those that abuse drugs and/or alcohol in the workplace.
The taxes added to tobacco and alcohol is often called a “sin tax.” In no way do they cover the true costs of the adverse effects on such so-called pleasures.
Proverbs 21:17 says, “He who loves pleasure will become poor; whoever loves wine and oil will never be rich.
Proverbs 23:19-21 has a similar warning: “Listen, my son, and be wise, and keep your heart on the right path. Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rages.”
As our national debt sours higher and higher like an out of control heroin and cocaine addict I wonder what a national spiritual awakening might do to save our spiraling health care costs and other costs from a lifestyle of sin. One person that quits smoking can save approximately 60 dollars a month and more dollars if not drinking alcohol. Other doctor, medicine and health related savings may be difficult to estimate but the reality is that Jesus can and does “save” us in more ways then one.
On a personal level, believers save money if they abstain from the world’s vices. This is a principal taught throughout the Scriptures.
Consider what might be a lifetime of savings it would be if the smoker and drinker put that same amount of money in a savings account to leave an inheritance to grandchildren. (Proverbs 13:22)
“The blessing of the Lord brings wealth, and he adds no trouble to it.” (Proverbs 10:22)
“He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honor.” (Proverbs 21:21)
“The house of the righteous contains great treasure, but the income of the wicked brings trouble.” (Proverbs 15:6) One trouble that often comes is bad health.
A godly lifestyle is an investment for eternity as well as good financial budgeting. Jesus saves souls and saves lives and He can help us save money in ways you may have never considered.
Of all the teachings and sermons I have ever heard that has to do with the improper use of money no one points out that a godly lifestyle is rewarded in financial saving as well as soul saving.
Proverbs 13:22 is a promise that is fulfilled in the ‘economics of salvation:’ “Good people leave an inheritance to their grandchildren, but the sinner’s wealth passes to the godly.”
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
After reading the Flagship Notes that my assistant edited, she responded with:
This is brilliant… being a sinner is so expensive! I can’t even begin to tell you how much money is down the drain because of my addiction. Lawyers, Police, Fines, Drugs, Paraphernalia, Cigarettes, Car crashes, Stealing from family, Stealing from Banks, Stealing from the Lord at a church…I could go on and on…But when Jesus saves- He saves our souls, but He also saves our bank accounts. Now, if I could only learn how to be a better steward, lol J
Great Flagship Notes!
-Mariah Tramonto
No 12
The following Flagship No 12 is a chapter from Don Wilkerson's upcoming manuscript that will be titled,
NOTES FROM THE FLAGSHIP - Lessons for a Pastor and Parachurch leader
LISTENING
I almost entitled this book Things They Never Taught Me in Bible College. Another thing I did not learn early on in my ministry is the importance, or what some call the art of listening.
Larry King, who retired from CNN in 2011 after having conducted some 40,000 interviews in his lifetime on radio and TV said, “I never learned anything while I was talking.
My wife said I don’t listen to her. At least I think that’s what she said.
Seriously, starting with my wife and kids I have not always been a good listener; reason being, I was too preoccupied with my own thoughts, needs, and plans. Selfishness and self-centeredness is at the root of being a poor or non-listener.
For leaders it’s essential.
My wife tells me I should not only listen when others speak to me but appear to be listening as well. I had an office person who would never look my in the eye when she spoke to me. She did not last long.
There are 3 levels of listening: (1) Listen to what is being said. (2) Listen to what is not being said. (3) Listen to what a person seems unable to say. Peter Drucker says "the most important thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said.
A teacher in school told our class that we would be graded not only on the answers we gave on tests and quizzes but by the questions we asked in class. I found myself as pastor often reluctant to say to a congregant, “How are you?” The answer would take too long and try my patience.
Too often we quit listening before the other person quits talking.
However, listen we must.
Spouses with their mate!
Parents with children!
Children with parents—at any age!
Pastors and leaders with hired staff, volunteers and the least among us.
My pastor father was loved by his congregation because he was a good listener; especially to those persons he called birds with a broken wing---people others often paid little attention to.
In counseling others I have often been quick to cut a person off and give advise when I don’t have all the facts; a clear violation of scripture. Proverbs 18:13 says, “To answer a question before you have heard it out is both stupid and insulting.” (NEB) Ouch!
In the epistle of James he writes, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak……(1:19)
Perhaps ministry schools need classes or a seminar purely on the subject of LISTENING. I am told that on Facebook or the Internet that capitol letters is the equivalent of shouting. I know! The caps are intended.
There are of course many things that we should not listen to (II Timothy 2:14) but that is not the topic here.
You can find numerous quotes about listening in a book on quotes. Here are a few of my favorites:
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
I almost entitled this book Things They Never Taught Me in Bible College. Another thing I did not learn early on in my ministry is the importance, or what some call the art of listening.
Larry King, who retired from CNN in 2011 after having conducted some 40,000 interviews in his lifetime on radio and TV said, “I never learned anything while I was talking.
My wife said I don’t listen to her. At least I think that’s what she said.
Seriously, starting with my wife and kids I have not always been a good listener; reason being, I was too preoccupied with my own thoughts, needs, and plans. Selfishness and self-centeredness is at the root of being a poor or non-listener.
For leaders it’s essential.
My wife tells me I should not only listen when others speak to me but appear to be listening as well. I had an office person who would never look my in the eye when she spoke to me. She did not last long.
There are 3 levels of listening: (1) Listen to what is being said. (2) Listen to what is not being said. (3) Listen to what a person seems unable to say. Peter Drucker says "the most important thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said.
A teacher in school told our class that we would be graded not only on the answers we gave on tests and quizzes but by the questions we asked in class. I found myself as pastor often reluctant to say to a congregant, “How are you?” The answer would take too long and try my patience.
Too often we quit listening before the other person quits talking.
However, listen we must.
Spouses with their mate!
Parents with children!
Children with parents—at any age!
Pastors and leaders with hired staff, volunteers and the least among us.
My pastor father was loved by his congregation because he was a good listener; especially to those persons he called birds with a broken wing---people others often paid little attention to.
In counseling others I have often been quick to cut a person off and give advise when I don’t have all the facts; a clear violation of scripture. Proverbs 18:13 says, “To answer a question before you have heard it out is both stupid and insulting.” (NEB) Ouch!
In the epistle of James he writes, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak……(1:19)
Perhaps ministry schools need classes or a seminar purely on the subject of LISTENING. I am told that on Facebook or the Internet that capitol letters is the equivalent of shouting. I know! The caps are intended.
There are of course many things that we should not listen to (II Timothy 2:14) but that is not the topic here.
You can find numerous quotes about listening in a book on quotes. Here are a few of my favorites:
- “We have two ears to listen and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.” (Epictetus)
- “The world is dying for want, not of good preaching, but of good listening.” (George Dana Boardman)
- “The first duty of love is to listen.” (Paul Tillich)
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
No 11
A GIFT YOU CAN GIVE
Acts 4: 36-37
“Joseph, a Levite from Cyprus, whom the apostle called Barnabas (which means Son of Encouragement), sold a field he owned and brought his money and put it at the apostle’s feet.”
Barnabas was not an evangelist. He was not an apostle. Barnabas wrote no Epistles that are part of Scripture. Yet he was one of the most influential and key leaders in the early church. Barnabas’ ministry was the kind that every one of us can do. It’s one of the most important ministries yet we do not give a title to this important service. You don’t need to go to special classes to have this ministry. You certainly don’t need to go to Bible School. Young, old, new converts, any convert can be a blessing in the body of Christ if they will do what Barnabas did. What am I talking about? I speak of the ministry of encouragement. It is a gift-a simple but powerful gift-you can give to others, to anyone. Barnabas whose name literally means “son of encouragement” quietly and effectively used his gift and calling to disciple the most important convert in the days of the early church—Saul of Tarsus-among other things.
It does not matter whether you’re a pastor, a leader, a church official or a recent convert you can do this. You should be engaged in one way or another in the ministry of encouragement. Someone who helps strengthen, up lift, comfort, and blesses others by words and deeds is giving this gift.
It is a Gift You Can Give! It costs nothing.
A young mother was sick in bed when her nine-year old daughter walked in from school. Thinking the mother was asleep; she quietly unfolded the blanket at the foot to the bed and gently tucked it around her mother. The mother stirred, and then whispered, “It wasn’t long ago that I was tucking you in. And now you’re covering me.”
The little girl bending over her mother, replied, “We take turns!”
We all must take our turn as being a Barnabas-giving the gift of encouragement to some one that needs it. IT IS A GIFT YOU CAN GIVE.
The Lord will take us through many testing’s and trails in order to turn us into a “son (or daughter) of Encouragement.”
One of the ways God uses to make us useful to others is to put us through the refiner’s fire. We come out of the fire with more compassion, more sensitivity to and for others. Encouragement is born out of suffering.
II Cor. 1:6 “If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted it is for your comfort, which produces in you, patient endurance of the same suffering we suffer.”
A certain monastery enforced a vow of silence. Each monk could utter only two words every five years, and those two words had to be spoken in the presence of the abbot. One of the monks, when given the opportunity to speak, said, “Bad food!” Five years later, his two words were, “Bed hard!” When given his third opportunity to speak five years later, he said, “I quit!”
“Well”, said the abbot, “you might as well quit. All you’ve done is nothing but complain since you got here.”
The point is: sometimes it only takes one or two negative words to discourage. On the other hand it sometimes only takes a few positive words to encourage.
If you want to give the gift of encouragement to others then keep your fears, doubts, and your complaints to yourself; share your courage and encouragement with others. If you know how to give the gift of encouragement to others-and have a reputation for such giving-when people see you coming they will be attracted to you. Otherwise they will turn away or avoid you. Catherine II of Russia said: “I praise loudly, I blame softly.”
II Cor. 12:15 “And I will gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I am loved.”
BARNABAS WAS A RISK TAKER!
Acts 9:26-28 And when he had come to Jerusalem, he [Apostle Paul] was trying to associate with the disciples; and they were afraid of him, not believing that he was a disciple. But Barnabas took hold of him and brought him to the apostles and described to them how he had seen the Lord on the road, and that he had talked to him, and how at Damascus he had spoken out boldly in the name of Jesus.
What a courageous thing this was for Barnabas to do. What if he was wrong? What if Saul was a fake, or a phony?
The believers in Jerusalem were outright skeptical of Saul’s conversion-and we should not blame them. No man had caused them more trouble, suffering, and persecution then Saul. “NO WAY” was the immediate reaction. Saul had been the worse nightmare for the small but growing Jesus movement. No wonder the believers “were afraid of him, not believing that he really was a disciple.” (Acts 9:26) Saul was the most dangerous man at that time. No body would speak to him
The only person willing to come forward and vouch for Saul’s conversion was Barnabas. And he took a great risk in doing so. What if he turned out to be wrong? What if Saul’s conversion was not true-Barnabas would look like a fool, or worse the church may have been in even greater danger.
Barnabas had knowledge of what took placed on the Damascus Road, and in the city of Damascus. He knew that Saul was powerfully and dramatically converted and was preaching. The safest thing for Barnabas to do would have been to keep quiet and make Saul have to stand up for himself, or worse, let Saul be rejected-but he didn’t do that. Barnabas realized that in Saul was a powerful potential for good, so he took a risk for the new convert and verified his conversion.
This is what one does when exercising the gift of exhortation, encouragement, and grace in behalf of those that others fear-or have no vision for their potential. When you have the gift of encouragement you are a risk taken with people of previous bad reputations.
I know one faith- based rehab program where they screen their applicants so carefully that they almost want a guarantee the person is going to stay in the program before they admit them. Listen: this is a risk-taking ministry. If you’re not willing to take risks on people then go work at a health spa-not in a TC Center.
Thank God for ministries that believe the gospel can change anyone-the Saul's, the gangsters, the criminals, the prostitutes, the rapists, the molesters, the murders. Ministries like Teen challenge are giving opportunities for the rejects to become redeemed.
There would never have been an Apostle named Peter if Jesus had not believed that a wishy-washy unstable fisherman could become a “rock”. There would never have been a liberator name Moses to lead the Exodus if God is not the God of second chances.
Investment strategist today talk about something called risk-reward trade off. What this means, as I understand it, is that if you take a really small risk in your investment you will probably get a small dividend. But, if when you make large risks there is the possibility of large dividends. That is apparently how some people get rich. They are big risk takers.
Barnabas was a big risk taker. He looked at Saul and some how felt that he was going to be a big winner for the cause of Christ. There is no way Barnabas could have known that when he stood up for Saul before the Jerusalem church that Saul would one day be the greatest missionary in all the history of the Christian movement, and that he would author more then half of the New Testament.
I challenge you to take risks of compassion on those that others may have given up on. Give the gift of encouragement to the hard cases, the backslider, or the rebellious ones.
A famous writer in America tells this story. When he was in college he liked to ask his professors a question at the end of a class period. He’d ask them, “What is the meaning of life?” Each time he’d ask that question the classmates would laugh, gather up their books, and prepare to leave the classroom as they were accustomed to the professors never answering the question.
But one day this student got a surprise answer from a new professor. When he asked the familiar question again “what is the meaning of life?” the professor softly answers: “yes, I am going to answer your question.” The students that were out of their seats sat back down.
The teacher drew from his pocket a small round mirror about the size of a US quarter. He explained that as he grew up in Germany during the war, his family was very poor, and he had few toys. One day he found broken pieces of a mirror, left over from a wreck of a German motorcycle. He tried in vain to piece the bits together, but finally ended up discarding all but the largest piece.
“This one,” he said holding it higher. “I was able by scratching it on as a stone to make it round. I began to play with it as a toy and became fascinated by the fact that I could reflect light into dark places where the sun would never shine-in deep holes and cervices and dark closets. It became a game to me to try to get light into the most inaccessible places I could find.”
The professor went on to explain by saying, “I kept the little mirror, and I went about growing up, and I would take it out at idle moments and continue the challenge of the game. As I became a man, I grew to understand that this was not just a child’s game but a metaphor for what I might do in my life...with what I have I can reflect light into dark places in this world-into the black places in the hearts of men-and help change some things in peoples lives.”
When the professor finished he took the small mirror and, holding it carefully, caught rays of light streaming through the window and reflected them in the face of the student who asked, “What is the meaning of life?”
Two important things happen when we help and encourage people to grow in Christ: (1) You will see pagans become true Christians as you shine light into darkness (2) We will see Saul’s turn into Paul’s.
Where do we get the term “Christian” from? At Antioch the believer’s were first called “Christians” but in a derogatory manner-and the term stuck. Those believers in Antioch made an impact on the whole city. Yes, they faced persecution, but they also set an example of how Christians live and the term “Christian” has been passed down through the ages. Much of the credit goes to Barnabas. And remember these Greeks-Gentiles-did not have a history of knowledge of the Old Testament and the law. They were coming out of a pagan society. The fact that the term was used there is remarkable.
Barnabas was a key factor in the growth of the new converts in Antioch. He stayed a whole year there teaching, challenging, encouraging and motivating them in the ways of the Lord. In this manner Barnabas was much like a Teen Challenge staff worker who works with residents through the year program.
It’s one thing to give the gift of encouragement through an occasional word of encouragement; it is another thing to live with someone and give comfort and encouragement day after day-and especially if it appears your words are falling on deaf ears.
There is a difference between giving a word of encouragement and having the ministry of encouragement. All of us at times can, and should, say nice things to others. This is relatively easy to do, especially when you see people at their best. But it is quite another thing to say positive things to people and mean it when you see them at their worst-day in and day out.
I read recently about a famous writer, author in America that said her father spoke the four most important words in her life. They were “Of course you can.” She always wanted to be a writer and was asked to submit her first article to a small town newspaper-but was afraid. Her father said, what he frequently said, “of course you can.” It gave her the courage to write the article and it launched a career that eventually made her famous as a bestseller author.
In Antioch Barnabas had the privilege of helping to disciple and train the man that would help take the gospels to the ends of the earth.
What excites me every time we open a new TC Center in another nation; is that I think that out on the streets the next Nicky Cruz is waiting to be found. Barnabas the Scripture says in Acts 11: 25-26 went to Tarsus to “seek” Saul. It does not say he went to find him but “seek” him. This suggests that Barnabas did not know where Saul was-he had to hunt for him. He took on himself the risk and immense responsibility to bringing Saul of Tarsus to Antioch without even submitted his name to the church in Jerusalem. The Spirit of God led Barnabas to this decision.
Barnabas must have known that by bringing in Saul, he was bringing in a bigger man than he was-bigger in talents and genius, bigger in the grasp of the truth, bigger in breath of vision and boldness of action...One Scottish preacher said, “I’d rather have a little of Barnabas’ grace than have all of Saul’s genius.”…Spurgeon made this statement: “It takes more grace than I can tell, to play the second fiddle well.”
It is rare indeed to find an older man, held high in the opinions of his brethren, who will allow himself to be eclipsed by a younger man. Barnabas was sensible enough to recognize his limitations.
Are we willing to be a supporter and encourager of others, even when it means recognizing they have gifts greater then ours and giving them a chance to use those gifts? That is what it means to be the “son of encouragement.”
BARNABAS GAVE UP HIS PERSONAL RIGHTS.
In I Cor. 9:6 Paul makes an interesting statement about he and Barnabas. He refers to the fact that he and Barnabas made their own living-they financially supported themselves as tent makers.
What he is saying is that in order to preach the gospel and fulfill the call of God it is sometimes necessary to make sacrifices, give up certain rights.
In I Cor. 9:19 Paul say’s “Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible.” This is a powerful statement. What Paul is saying is that his greatest desire was to serve others without anyone questioning his motives. He gave up his rights for personal financial support to prove to others that what he was doing was not for personal gain, but for the good of the church and reaching the lost.
The wonderful thing about the ministry of encouragement is that anyone can give it. It’s not something you do because it’s your job. It’s not something you do because you’re personally rewarded. We don’t help others to make ourselves look good. We do it for the glory of God.
I have had staff work for me that viewed they’re worth by the size of the office I gave them, or the title they were given, or the salary they were given. Listen if you’re striving for a position, a title, for the praise of man-then you should get out of the ministry. Go get a job at some local company where your worth is in dollars and cents.
We are in the work of giving the gift of Gods love and grace without seeking credit for it. Some of the best workers I have known are those who quietly go about their ministry of the gift giving of encouragement in any and every way they can. Paul says, “I became all things to all men so that by all possible means I may save some.”
Have you given up your personal rights so that others may be helped, saved, and changed?
I’ve seen workers in churches, and in Teen Challenge-you give them a task and they think they own that task and no one else better invade their territory. Musicians are the most temperamental. Worship teams members sometimes think only they can have the anointing to lead in worship.
The ministry is not about me or you-it’s about sharing Jesus with others. It’s about using your gifts and talents to bless others. If God wants to use someone else to do what you’re doing-then help and encourage them to do it-and God will use you in some other way.
Have you surrendered your rights to God? Are you willing to give up whatever God asks of you? Paul said in I Cor. 9:23 “I do all this for the sake of the gospel that I may share in its blessing.”
Acts 4: 36-37
“Joseph, a Levite from Cyprus, whom the apostle called Barnabas (which means Son of Encouragement), sold a field he owned and brought his money and put it at the apostle’s feet.”
Barnabas was not an evangelist. He was not an apostle. Barnabas wrote no Epistles that are part of Scripture. Yet he was one of the most influential and key leaders in the early church. Barnabas’ ministry was the kind that every one of us can do. It’s one of the most important ministries yet we do not give a title to this important service. You don’t need to go to special classes to have this ministry. You certainly don’t need to go to Bible School. Young, old, new converts, any convert can be a blessing in the body of Christ if they will do what Barnabas did. What am I talking about? I speak of the ministry of encouragement. It is a gift-a simple but powerful gift-you can give to others, to anyone. Barnabas whose name literally means “son of encouragement” quietly and effectively used his gift and calling to disciple the most important convert in the days of the early church—Saul of Tarsus-among other things.
It does not matter whether you’re a pastor, a leader, a church official or a recent convert you can do this. You should be engaged in one way or another in the ministry of encouragement. Someone who helps strengthen, up lift, comfort, and blesses others by words and deeds is giving this gift.
It is a Gift You Can Give! It costs nothing.
A young mother was sick in bed when her nine-year old daughter walked in from school. Thinking the mother was asleep; she quietly unfolded the blanket at the foot to the bed and gently tucked it around her mother. The mother stirred, and then whispered, “It wasn’t long ago that I was tucking you in. And now you’re covering me.”
The little girl bending over her mother, replied, “We take turns!”
We all must take our turn as being a Barnabas-giving the gift of encouragement to some one that needs it. IT IS A GIFT YOU CAN GIVE.
The Lord will take us through many testing’s and trails in order to turn us into a “son (or daughter) of Encouragement.”
One of the ways God uses to make us useful to others is to put us through the refiner’s fire. We come out of the fire with more compassion, more sensitivity to and for others. Encouragement is born out of suffering.
II Cor. 1:6 “If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted it is for your comfort, which produces in you, patient endurance of the same suffering we suffer.”
A certain monastery enforced a vow of silence. Each monk could utter only two words every five years, and those two words had to be spoken in the presence of the abbot. One of the monks, when given the opportunity to speak, said, “Bad food!” Five years later, his two words were, “Bed hard!” When given his third opportunity to speak five years later, he said, “I quit!”
“Well”, said the abbot, “you might as well quit. All you’ve done is nothing but complain since you got here.”
The point is: sometimes it only takes one or two negative words to discourage. On the other hand it sometimes only takes a few positive words to encourage.
If you want to give the gift of encouragement to others then keep your fears, doubts, and your complaints to yourself; share your courage and encouragement with others. If you know how to give the gift of encouragement to others-and have a reputation for such giving-when people see you coming they will be attracted to you. Otherwise they will turn away or avoid you. Catherine II of Russia said: “I praise loudly, I blame softly.”
II Cor. 12:15 “And I will gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I am loved.”
BARNABAS WAS A RISK TAKER!
Acts 9:26-28 And when he had come to Jerusalem, he [Apostle Paul] was trying to associate with the disciples; and they were afraid of him, not believing that he was a disciple. But Barnabas took hold of him and brought him to the apostles and described to them how he had seen the Lord on the road, and that he had talked to him, and how at Damascus he had spoken out boldly in the name of Jesus.
What a courageous thing this was for Barnabas to do. What if he was wrong? What if Saul was a fake, or a phony?
The believers in Jerusalem were outright skeptical of Saul’s conversion-and we should not blame them. No man had caused them more trouble, suffering, and persecution then Saul. “NO WAY” was the immediate reaction. Saul had been the worse nightmare for the small but growing Jesus movement. No wonder the believers “were afraid of him, not believing that he really was a disciple.” (Acts 9:26) Saul was the most dangerous man at that time. No body would speak to him
The only person willing to come forward and vouch for Saul’s conversion was Barnabas. And he took a great risk in doing so. What if he turned out to be wrong? What if Saul’s conversion was not true-Barnabas would look like a fool, or worse the church may have been in even greater danger.
Barnabas had knowledge of what took placed on the Damascus Road, and in the city of Damascus. He knew that Saul was powerfully and dramatically converted and was preaching. The safest thing for Barnabas to do would have been to keep quiet and make Saul have to stand up for himself, or worse, let Saul be rejected-but he didn’t do that. Barnabas realized that in Saul was a powerful potential for good, so he took a risk for the new convert and verified his conversion.
This is what one does when exercising the gift of exhortation, encouragement, and grace in behalf of those that others fear-or have no vision for their potential. When you have the gift of encouragement you are a risk taken with people of previous bad reputations.
I know one faith- based rehab program where they screen their applicants so carefully that they almost want a guarantee the person is going to stay in the program before they admit them. Listen: this is a risk-taking ministry. If you’re not willing to take risks on people then go work at a health spa-not in a TC Center.
Thank God for ministries that believe the gospel can change anyone-the Saul's, the gangsters, the criminals, the prostitutes, the rapists, the molesters, the murders. Ministries like Teen challenge are giving opportunities for the rejects to become redeemed.
There would never have been an Apostle named Peter if Jesus had not believed that a wishy-washy unstable fisherman could become a “rock”. There would never have been a liberator name Moses to lead the Exodus if God is not the God of second chances.
Investment strategist today talk about something called risk-reward trade off. What this means, as I understand it, is that if you take a really small risk in your investment you will probably get a small dividend. But, if when you make large risks there is the possibility of large dividends. That is apparently how some people get rich. They are big risk takers.
Barnabas was a big risk taker. He looked at Saul and some how felt that he was going to be a big winner for the cause of Christ. There is no way Barnabas could have known that when he stood up for Saul before the Jerusalem church that Saul would one day be the greatest missionary in all the history of the Christian movement, and that he would author more then half of the New Testament.
I challenge you to take risks of compassion on those that others may have given up on. Give the gift of encouragement to the hard cases, the backslider, or the rebellious ones.
A famous writer in America tells this story. When he was in college he liked to ask his professors a question at the end of a class period. He’d ask them, “What is the meaning of life?” Each time he’d ask that question the classmates would laugh, gather up their books, and prepare to leave the classroom as they were accustomed to the professors never answering the question.
But one day this student got a surprise answer from a new professor. When he asked the familiar question again “what is the meaning of life?” the professor softly answers: “yes, I am going to answer your question.” The students that were out of their seats sat back down.
The teacher drew from his pocket a small round mirror about the size of a US quarter. He explained that as he grew up in Germany during the war, his family was very poor, and he had few toys. One day he found broken pieces of a mirror, left over from a wreck of a German motorcycle. He tried in vain to piece the bits together, but finally ended up discarding all but the largest piece.
“This one,” he said holding it higher. “I was able by scratching it on as a stone to make it round. I began to play with it as a toy and became fascinated by the fact that I could reflect light into dark places where the sun would never shine-in deep holes and cervices and dark closets. It became a game to me to try to get light into the most inaccessible places I could find.”
The professor went on to explain by saying, “I kept the little mirror, and I went about growing up, and I would take it out at idle moments and continue the challenge of the game. As I became a man, I grew to understand that this was not just a child’s game but a metaphor for what I might do in my life...with what I have I can reflect light into dark places in this world-into the black places in the hearts of men-and help change some things in peoples lives.”
When the professor finished he took the small mirror and, holding it carefully, caught rays of light streaming through the window and reflected them in the face of the student who asked, “What is the meaning of life?”
Two important things happen when we help and encourage people to grow in Christ: (1) You will see pagans become true Christians as you shine light into darkness (2) We will see Saul’s turn into Paul’s.
Where do we get the term “Christian” from? At Antioch the believer’s were first called “Christians” but in a derogatory manner-and the term stuck. Those believers in Antioch made an impact on the whole city. Yes, they faced persecution, but they also set an example of how Christians live and the term “Christian” has been passed down through the ages. Much of the credit goes to Barnabas. And remember these Greeks-Gentiles-did not have a history of knowledge of the Old Testament and the law. They were coming out of a pagan society. The fact that the term was used there is remarkable.
Barnabas was a key factor in the growth of the new converts in Antioch. He stayed a whole year there teaching, challenging, encouraging and motivating them in the ways of the Lord. In this manner Barnabas was much like a Teen Challenge staff worker who works with residents through the year program.
It’s one thing to give the gift of encouragement through an occasional word of encouragement; it is another thing to live with someone and give comfort and encouragement day after day-and especially if it appears your words are falling on deaf ears.
There is a difference between giving a word of encouragement and having the ministry of encouragement. All of us at times can, and should, say nice things to others. This is relatively easy to do, especially when you see people at their best. But it is quite another thing to say positive things to people and mean it when you see them at their worst-day in and day out.
I read recently about a famous writer, author in America that said her father spoke the four most important words in her life. They were “Of course you can.” She always wanted to be a writer and was asked to submit her first article to a small town newspaper-but was afraid. Her father said, what he frequently said, “of course you can.” It gave her the courage to write the article and it launched a career that eventually made her famous as a bestseller author.
In Antioch Barnabas had the privilege of helping to disciple and train the man that would help take the gospels to the ends of the earth.
What excites me every time we open a new TC Center in another nation; is that I think that out on the streets the next Nicky Cruz is waiting to be found. Barnabas the Scripture says in Acts 11: 25-26 went to Tarsus to “seek” Saul. It does not say he went to find him but “seek” him. This suggests that Barnabas did not know where Saul was-he had to hunt for him. He took on himself the risk and immense responsibility to bringing Saul of Tarsus to Antioch without even submitted his name to the church in Jerusalem. The Spirit of God led Barnabas to this decision.
Barnabas must have known that by bringing in Saul, he was bringing in a bigger man than he was-bigger in talents and genius, bigger in the grasp of the truth, bigger in breath of vision and boldness of action...One Scottish preacher said, “I’d rather have a little of Barnabas’ grace than have all of Saul’s genius.”…Spurgeon made this statement: “It takes more grace than I can tell, to play the second fiddle well.”
It is rare indeed to find an older man, held high in the opinions of his brethren, who will allow himself to be eclipsed by a younger man. Barnabas was sensible enough to recognize his limitations.
Are we willing to be a supporter and encourager of others, even when it means recognizing they have gifts greater then ours and giving them a chance to use those gifts? That is what it means to be the “son of encouragement.”
BARNABAS GAVE UP HIS PERSONAL RIGHTS.
In I Cor. 9:6 Paul makes an interesting statement about he and Barnabas. He refers to the fact that he and Barnabas made their own living-they financially supported themselves as tent makers.
What he is saying is that in order to preach the gospel and fulfill the call of God it is sometimes necessary to make sacrifices, give up certain rights.
In I Cor. 9:19 Paul say’s “Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible.” This is a powerful statement. What Paul is saying is that his greatest desire was to serve others without anyone questioning his motives. He gave up his rights for personal financial support to prove to others that what he was doing was not for personal gain, but for the good of the church and reaching the lost.
The wonderful thing about the ministry of encouragement is that anyone can give it. It’s not something you do because it’s your job. It’s not something you do because you’re personally rewarded. We don’t help others to make ourselves look good. We do it for the glory of God.
I have had staff work for me that viewed they’re worth by the size of the office I gave them, or the title they were given, or the salary they were given. Listen if you’re striving for a position, a title, for the praise of man-then you should get out of the ministry. Go get a job at some local company where your worth is in dollars and cents.
We are in the work of giving the gift of Gods love and grace without seeking credit for it. Some of the best workers I have known are those who quietly go about their ministry of the gift giving of encouragement in any and every way they can. Paul says, “I became all things to all men so that by all possible means I may save some.”
Have you given up your personal rights so that others may be helped, saved, and changed?
I’ve seen workers in churches, and in Teen Challenge-you give them a task and they think they own that task and no one else better invade their territory. Musicians are the most temperamental. Worship teams members sometimes think only they can have the anointing to lead in worship.
The ministry is not about me or you-it’s about sharing Jesus with others. It’s about using your gifts and talents to bless others. If God wants to use someone else to do what you’re doing-then help and encourage them to do it-and God will use you in some other way.
Have you surrendered your rights to God? Are you willing to give up whatever God asks of you? Paul said in I Cor. 9:23 “I do all this for the sake of the gospel that I may share in its blessing.”
No 10
WHAT TEEN CHALLENGE CAN TEACH THE CHURCH
(A sermon by Don Wilkerson preached in a church)
Teen Challenge is a place that we can call The Land of Beginning Again.
I take this title from a poem by Louis Fletcher Tarkington.I wish that there were some wonderful place,
Called the Land of Beginning Again,
Where all our mistakes and all our heartaches And all of our selfish grief
Could be dropped like a shabby old coat at the door
And never put on again.
There are 4 things that Teen Challenge can share that might teach the church about The Land of Beginning Again.
1. We are a ministry that sees the fulfillment of Romans 5:20 “Where sin abounds grace doth much more abound.”
In all my years working in TC I have never had to convince one of our residents that they are sinners. A fellow told me that he’d never gone to church, never read the Bible--but that he came to believe in God in spite of that. I asked why he believed in God. His answer was interesting. He said, “Rev. I’ve had the devil in me so long, I just knew there had to be someone else on the other side of the coin.”
All of our residents have a past they are not proud of and want to forget. But one thing is sure is that regardless of ones past record their sin and sins can be forgiven because: “Where sin abounds grace doth much more abound.”
This has been true throughout Old and New Testament times.
Who was the first convert when the children of Israel entered the promise Land? It was a prostitute named Rehab!
The first convert in Jesus ministry was a woman of an unsavory character in Samaria; someone that no devout Jews would have spoken to or even associated with but Jesus gave her living water and a revival broke out in her village as a result of her testimony.
The last convert when Jesus was crucified was a thief---a felon!
The largest New Testament church in Corinth was made up of former sex addicts, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, drunkards, abusers and swindlers and more--yet all of the Bible says, “all their sins had been washed away.”
The last recorded convert in Paul’s writing was a runaway slave and thief by the name of Onesimus who was converted under Paul’s ministry and was sent home again a forgiven man.
We see the same miraculous transformations taking place almost weekly at TC.-- “Where sin abounded grace now abounds even more.” The lepers are cleansed, those in darkness have come into the light, and the dead have been raised to new life in Christ.
If it can happen in Teen Challenge it can happen here in the church and to those in this community or if you have loved ones with a life controlling problem---you need to be reminded that “Where sin abounds grace doth much more abound.” God has a bail out plan for all sinners and debtors. Withdrawn can be made at the bank of heaven called GRACE SAVINGS AND LOVE BANK.
2. At Teen Challenge we see visible evidence of the fact that God’s arm has a long, long reach. Isaiah 50:2 “Is my arm shortened, that it cannot save?”
Some of these students have known what is often called the long arm of the law. Some of them have had to pay the penalty for having broken the law. I don’t know the total years some of our students have spent in jail but for a few its been many years---the arm of the law snatched them and put them away. Now they have known the long arm of God to reach them and lift them from the depths of despair.---and is setting them free.
God can pull a man out of the bar room. He can pull an addict out of a dope house. Christ can pull a criminal out of physical prisons and mental and emotional prisons. Gods arm is not afraid to reach way down in a mud pit and save a rebel, a backslider, or He can reach way up to the proud man or woman who think themselves above the need for God.
Psalms 98:1 “Oh sing to the Lord a new song! For he has done marvelous things; His right hand and His holy arm have gained them the victory.”
I love to see the reach of God’s love that takes a broken heart and heals it; takes a broken marriage and saves it; takes a prodigal and returns him or her to the Fathers house.
3. Jesus Christ is the cure!
When it comes to the problem of addiction and the various programs to treat the addiction, I can say that only Teen Challenge graduates people from the program. Let me explain.
Most secular programs and even those that are what I call quasi-religious and subscribe to the famous Twelve Step program that has been successful for many in AA; there is one problem I have with those types of treatment. They say addiction is a disease and I say it’s a moral and spiritual problem. If addiction is a disease then I believe it’s a curable disease. The problem however with the disease model of treatment is that the medical profession and psychology say that the disease of addiction is incurable and that the best the addict can hope for is that the disease goes into remission---and that the addict needs lifetime treatment for the addiction. This guarantees the medical profession a lifetime of clients. In TC we believe that according to II Corinthians 5:17 “If any man [or woman] be in Christ Jesus old things pass away; behold, all thing become new.” When you are born again the old habits and addiction die and a new person is resurrected with Christ.
In TC graduation is a big deal because the door to the past and the old man is closed and a new chapter and a new life begins.
If you, or anyone you know, does not believe in a cure and deliverance TC is one place to look to see evidence of changed lives. If anyone has a life-controlling problem and they wake up in the morning they do not have to hope just for one more day of sobriety---they can wake up to an eternal new life in which the old is gone and the new has come.
God has a stimulus package that works.
4. Teen Challenge can inspire hope for all who are praying for an unsaved loved one; and especially if that loved one has a serious life-controlling problem.
No one is beyond redemption!
If you were to ask me- what is the first thing one must do if they need to change their life, I say, you gotta have hope.
(A sermon by Don Wilkerson preached in a church)
Teen Challenge is a place that we can call The Land of Beginning Again.
I take this title from a poem by Louis Fletcher Tarkington.I wish that there were some wonderful place,
Called the Land of Beginning Again,
Where all our mistakes and all our heartaches And all of our selfish grief
Could be dropped like a shabby old coat at the door
And never put on again.
There are 4 things that Teen Challenge can share that might teach the church about The Land of Beginning Again.
1. We are a ministry that sees the fulfillment of Romans 5:20 “Where sin abounds grace doth much more abound.”
In all my years working in TC I have never had to convince one of our residents that they are sinners. A fellow told me that he’d never gone to church, never read the Bible--but that he came to believe in God in spite of that. I asked why he believed in God. His answer was interesting. He said, “Rev. I’ve had the devil in me so long, I just knew there had to be someone else on the other side of the coin.”
All of our residents have a past they are not proud of and want to forget. But one thing is sure is that regardless of ones past record their sin and sins can be forgiven because: “Where sin abounds grace doth much more abound.”
This has been true throughout Old and New Testament times.
Who was the first convert when the children of Israel entered the promise Land? It was a prostitute named Rehab!
The first convert in Jesus ministry was a woman of an unsavory character in Samaria; someone that no devout Jews would have spoken to or even associated with but Jesus gave her living water and a revival broke out in her village as a result of her testimony.
The last convert when Jesus was crucified was a thief---a felon!
The largest New Testament church in Corinth was made up of former sex addicts, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, drunkards, abusers and swindlers and more--yet all of the Bible says, “all their sins had been washed away.”
The last recorded convert in Paul’s writing was a runaway slave and thief by the name of Onesimus who was converted under Paul’s ministry and was sent home again a forgiven man.
We see the same miraculous transformations taking place almost weekly at TC.-- “Where sin abounded grace now abounds even more.” The lepers are cleansed, those in darkness have come into the light, and the dead have been raised to new life in Christ.
If it can happen in Teen Challenge it can happen here in the church and to those in this community or if you have loved ones with a life controlling problem---you need to be reminded that “Where sin abounds grace doth much more abound.” God has a bail out plan for all sinners and debtors. Withdrawn can be made at the bank of heaven called GRACE SAVINGS AND LOVE BANK.
2. At Teen Challenge we see visible evidence of the fact that God’s arm has a long, long reach. Isaiah 50:2 “Is my arm shortened, that it cannot save?”
Some of these students have known what is often called the long arm of the law. Some of them have had to pay the penalty for having broken the law. I don’t know the total years some of our students have spent in jail but for a few its been many years---the arm of the law snatched them and put them away. Now they have known the long arm of God to reach them and lift them from the depths of despair.---and is setting them free.
God can pull a man out of the bar room. He can pull an addict out of a dope house. Christ can pull a criminal out of physical prisons and mental and emotional prisons. Gods arm is not afraid to reach way down in a mud pit and save a rebel, a backslider, or He can reach way up to the proud man or woman who think themselves above the need for God.
Psalms 98:1 “Oh sing to the Lord a new song! For he has done marvelous things; His right hand and His holy arm have gained them the victory.”
I love to see the reach of God’s love that takes a broken heart and heals it; takes a broken marriage and saves it; takes a prodigal and returns him or her to the Fathers house.
3. Jesus Christ is the cure!
When it comes to the problem of addiction and the various programs to treat the addiction, I can say that only Teen Challenge graduates people from the program. Let me explain.
Most secular programs and even those that are what I call quasi-religious and subscribe to the famous Twelve Step program that has been successful for many in AA; there is one problem I have with those types of treatment. They say addiction is a disease and I say it’s a moral and spiritual problem. If addiction is a disease then I believe it’s a curable disease. The problem however with the disease model of treatment is that the medical profession and psychology say that the disease of addiction is incurable and that the best the addict can hope for is that the disease goes into remission---and that the addict needs lifetime treatment for the addiction. This guarantees the medical profession a lifetime of clients. In TC we believe that according to II Corinthians 5:17 “If any man [or woman] be in Christ Jesus old things pass away; behold, all thing become new.” When you are born again the old habits and addiction die and a new person is resurrected with Christ.
In TC graduation is a big deal because the door to the past and the old man is closed and a new chapter and a new life begins.
If you, or anyone you know, does not believe in a cure and deliverance TC is one place to look to see evidence of changed lives. If anyone has a life-controlling problem and they wake up in the morning they do not have to hope just for one more day of sobriety---they can wake up to an eternal new life in which the old is gone and the new has come.
God has a stimulus package that works.
4. Teen Challenge can inspire hope for all who are praying for an unsaved loved one; and especially if that loved one has a serious life-controlling problem.
No one is beyond redemption!
If you were to ask me- what is the first thing one must do if they need to change their life, I say, you gotta have hope.
No 9
Ropeholders
Acts 9:20-25
Dr. Wayde Goodall
Dr. Luke wrote two books in the New Testament and two-volume history of the New Testament Church.
Acts 9:20-25
"And straightway he preached Christ in the synagogues, that he is the Son of God. But all that heard him were amazed, and said; Is not this he that destroyed them which called on this name in Jerusalem, and came hither for that intent, that he might bring them bound unto the chief priests? But Saul increased the more in strength, and confounded the Jews, which dwelt at Damascus, proving that this is the very Christ. And after that many days were fulfilled, the Jews took counsel to kill him. Then the disciples took him by night, and let him down by the wall in a basket."
We know that Saul was a persecutor of the early church. Saul approved and watched the first martyr of the church die (Steven). "Saul was consenting to his death" Acts 8:1
"As for Saul, he made havoc of the church, entering every house, and dragging off men and women, committing them to prison." Acts 8:3 In fact--he was on the way to Damascus to find Christians -- in order to put them into prison or even have them killed.
ACTS 9 Story
The Bible tells us that: Straightway he preached Christ in the synagogue, that he is the Son of God.
The Persecutor became the Preacher!
I want to talk to you about the ROPEHOLDERS: Four things I'd like to observe about these people
1. No names are given of the people who held his rope
Someone said, "God can do much through someone who doesn't care who gets the glory."
William Carrey (India) said to his home church; "While I am in India, be my ropeholder."
2. The ropeholders did it by night
They put their lives on the line for this person named Saul. If they were caught - they could have lost their lives. They held on to the rope -- even when it was dark. Many will hold on in the day (when everyone is watching) - but when know one is looking -- let go.
Martin Luther King: Concerning the Good Samaritan
We hold on by night
3. The ropeholders held on until the basket hit the ground
Ropeholders hold on until the job is finished. They don't quit!
Why do ropeholders hold on?
1. They could be the only one's holding the rope.
If you don't do it -- who will?
2. The basket you're holding on to -- could touch the ground at any time. Hold on!
Don't quit! People quit too soon. "The greatest darkness comes just before dawn"
Sometimes we believe for people that are out of strength. We persist, plod, pursue, and are tenacious, until the work is complete.
ROPEHOLDERS:
4. The ropeholders did not know who was in the basket
Who was in the basket? SAUL
Who was Saul? A Jewish Rabbi - who came to Jesus
They had no idea that:
Who's rope are you holding?
Don't let the rope go!
Acts 9:20-25
Dr. Wayde Goodall
Dr. Luke wrote two books in the New Testament and two-volume history of the New Testament Church.
- Vol. 1 "History of the Founder of the Church
- Vol. 2 "History of the followers of the church
Acts 9:20-25
"And straightway he preached Christ in the synagogues, that he is the Son of God. But all that heard him were amazed, and said; Is not this he that destroyed them which called on this name in Jerusalem, and came hither for that intent, that he might bring them bound unto the chief priests? But Saul increased the more in strength, and confounded the Jews, which dwelt at Damascus, proving that this is the very Christ. And after that many days were fulfilled, the Jews took counsel to kill him. Then the disciples took him by night, and let him down by the wall in a basket."
We know that Saul was a persecutor of the early church. Saul approved and watched the first martyr of the church die (Steven). "Saul was consenting to his death" Acts 8:1
"As for Saul, he made havoc of the church, entering every house, and dragging off men and women, committing them to prison." Acts 8:3 In fact--he was on the way to Damascus to find Christians -- in order to put them into prison or even have them killed.
ACTS 9 Story
The Bible tells us that: Straightway he preached Christ in the synagogue, that he is the Son of God.
The Persecutor became the Preacher!
I want to talk to you about the ROPEHOLDERS: Four things I'd like to observe about these people
1. No names are given of the people who held his rope
Someone said, "God can do much through someone who doesn't care who gets the glory."
William Carrey (India) said to his home church; "While I am in India, be my ropeholder."
- Husbands are ropeholders for their wives
- Wives are ropeholders for their husbands
- Parents are ropeholders for their children
- Pastors are ropeholders in their cities
- Missionaries are ropeholders for nations
- Living in garbage dumps in Egypt
- Sexual slavery in India
- China, India, Africa, Cuba, etc.
- 100 million Aids orphans by 2020 in Africa
2. The ropeholders did it by night
They put their lives on the line for this person named Saul. If they were caught - they could have lost their lives. They held on to the rope -- even when it was dark. Many will hold on in the day (when everyone is watching) - but when know one is looking -- let go.
- Paul's friend (Demas) left him when he was in prison. He didn't hold on by night.
- Peter denied the Lord when his life was in danger.
- He attacks our missionaries, workers, project leaders, pastors, evangelists, and leaders.
- Sometimes these leaders are terribly wounded, emotionally burnt out -- or have fallen.
- Who will be their ropeholder?
Martin Luther King: Concerning the Good Samaritan
- The difference between the religious leaders and the Good Samaritan?
- The religious leaders thought: "If I stop - what will happen to me?"
- The Samaritan thought: If I don't stop - what will happen to this man?"
We hold on by night
3. The ropeholders held on until the basket hit the ground
Ropeholders hold on until the job is finished. They don't quit!
Why do ropeholders hold on?
1. They could be the only one's holding the rope.
If you don't do it -- who will?
2. The basket you're holding on to -- could touch the ground at any time. Hold on!
Don't quit! People quit too soon. "The greatest darkness comes just before dawn"
Sometimes we believe for people that are out of strength. We persist, plod, pursue, and are tenacious, until the work is complete.
ROPEHOLDERS:
- Are not concerned about NAME RECOGNITION
- Are willing to do the right thing, even if it is dangerous
- Don’t quit until the job is finished
4. The ropeholders did not know who was in the basket
Who was in the basket? SAUL
Who was Saul? A Jewish Rabbi - who came to Jesus
They had no idea that:
- Saul would become PAUL
- He would become an Apostle
- He would write 13 books of the NEW TESTAMENT (the new Covenant from God)
- He would become the most influential person for the Church of Jesus Christ -- and very possibly has been for 2000 years
Who's rope are you holding?
Don't let the rope go!
No 8
Teen Challenge Residential Staff-Student Relations
7 COMMON MISTAKES STAFF MAKE WITH STUDENTS
All quotes, unless otherwise stated, are from John C. Maxwell’s book entitled, "Everyone Communicates Few Connect".
What are some of the mistakes I observe staff make with students?
1. Saying The Right Thing In The Wrong Way
Tone of voice is a form of communication. Colossians 4:6 “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” Yes, speech and communication should be pleasant - “seasoned with salt” - not sap. Often we are unaware of our manner of speaking. We must remember we deal with people who come often from backgrounds where the language of families was done in anger; deservedly or not deservedly. We deal with those who are emotionally like children and children need speech “seasoned with salt.”
“If you want people to remember what you say, you need to say the right thing at the right moment in the right way.” In the heat of someone’s disobedience we can react improperly rather then act righteously. The Bible says, “In your patience possess ye your souls”, I take this to mean to have self-control when others may be out of control. Proverbs 10:20, “Good mans talk is like rare silver.” “God has given us two ears, but one tongue, to show that we should be swift to hear, but slow to speak. God has set a double fence before the tongue, the teeth and the lips, to teach us to be weary that we offend with the tongue.” --Thomas Watson
2. Beware Of Robot Relationships
Actually you can’t have a relationship with a robot! These are workers that are on automatic pilot giving orders and instructions without regard to the feelings of others. We should not be like an uncaring clerk in a store or as a stern security guard at the mall trying to demonstrate a tough guy image. “If your face is going to “talk” for you anyway, you may as well have it communicate something positive.”
Use your head to handle yourself, your heart to handle others. A pastor states: “I never realized how many nonverbal mistakes I was making until I saw myself on video. Now it is my regular practice to go back and review myself on tape to determine not only what I said, but how I said it. The tape does not lie.” “People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude.”
I don’t want workers that perform like they can’t wait to get off duty; having no joy, no enthusiasm and no impact on the students. TC is not a job—it’s a calling—a calling that needs to be motivated by love, joy and peace. If you have to keep reminding students that you’re in authority your authority will not be respected. A staff once told me, “tell the students they have to listen to me.” I answered, “I can’t do that! You have to earn the right to be listened to by the way you communicate and connect with the students.”
“More then 90 percent of the impression we often convey has nothing to do with what we actually say.” “What we say accounts for only 7 % of what is believed.” “The way we say it accounts for 38 percent." “What others see accounts for 55 percent.”
As staff the students need to see someone that earns respect by demonstrating a Christ like character and compassion for the students. When this is done it will command authority.
“If you wish to know what a man is, place him in authority.” --Ancient proverb
“Authority without wisdom is like a heavy axe without an edge, fitter to bruise than polish.” --Anne Bradstreet
3. Not Listening
My wife tells me that I don’t always listen to her. At least I think that’s what she said. One of the greatest gifts you can give someone is a little bit of your time to listen to them. Even if what is said is small talk or uninteresting talk; to listen is to show you care. Again my wife instructs me:“You need to not only listen but to appear that you’re listening.” In other words look at her! Good advice for staff with students as well.
Every course I ever took in Bible College prepared me to speak, teach, preach and counsel - not one taught me the importance of listening.
There are 3 levels in listening:
“None so deaf as those who won’t hear.” --Ancient proverb
Larry King the CNN interviewer said, “I never learned anything while I was talking.”
“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak….” --James 1:19
4. Too Busy!
“We aren’t in the coffee business, serving people. We’re in the people business, serving coffee.” --A Coffee shop owner
Teen Challenge is not just in the soul saving business or the business of changing lives; we are in the business (calling) of coming along side residents to be the instrument of grace to help make this happen. The Teen Challenge “program” is not simply the rules, the Bible, the discipline; it’s that for sure but it’s also all about how we serve. The staff makes the program for better or worse.
I always teach that we have 2 curriculums. There is the classroom curriculum and then we the staff are the “other” curriculum; living epistles know and read by all the students for good or for ill. The old quote applies here: “People would rather see a sermon then hear it.” If staff are so caught up in running the “program” without connecting with the students then the program becomes self defeating. We must not be like busy parents that have no time for their children. "Trust is even more important than love." --Jeffrey Gitomer
Ponder these verse from I Kings 10:39-40, Now as the king passed by, he cried out to the king and said, “Your servant went out into the midst of the battle; and there a man came over and brought a man to me, and said, ‘Guard this man; if by any means he is missing, your life shall be for his life, or else you shall pay a talent of silver.” While your servant was busy here and there, he was gone.” Then the king of Israel said to him, “So shall your judgment be, you yourself have decided it.”
My prayer for myself and my staff is that we are not so busy majoring in minors that someone left the program because we were busy, “here and there and he [or she] was gone” and left the program because of our business.
5. Not Understanding How To Use Authority
If you have to keep reminding students that you’re in authority your authority will not be respected. A staff once told me, “tell the students they have to listen to me.” I answered, “I can’t do that! You have to earn the right to be listened to by the way you communicate and connect with the students.” Sometimes the leadership of a ministry does not spell out what lines of authority are. And, its also the case that those who should take authority in certain situations do not do so.
As has already been stated that a staff can be given a title but getting students to respect the authority that goes with the position is something that takes time. In my early days of TC, I was in my early 20’s; I asked a student how he was doing. “Not good,” he answered. “Why?” I asked. “I am having trouble taking orders from you. I’m a grown man in my 40’s and you’re just a kid.” I said, “You got it wrong. I am 20 years older then you. Around here we go by spiritual age not biological age.” He smiled and accepted that. Some students will always try to be intimidating and like a child or teenager see how far they can get away with things. The misuse of authority only creates more rebellion. The spirit of the age is individualism taken to an extreme resulting in rebellion to any and all authority. Students bring it with them into the program. Facing it is one of the biggest ‘challenges’ of Teen Challenge. It takes a very wise and humble staff to earn the right to be respected for the authority they have to use.
Finding the middle ground between law and grace, tough love and sloppy love---is not acquired easily. Know yourself! Are you soft in your personality; acquire toughness. Are you stern by nature and personality; ask God to give you more mercy and grace.
6. Preoccupation With Your Own Self-Interest
There can be two kinds of business: being too busy with ministry duties that take us away from the main thing we’re all about---helping others; and busy with personal things on the ministry clock. One of the things I hate to hear is, “I’m not on duty now.” As a pastor, father, husband I am always “on duty.” This does not mean we allow our leaders or students to take advantage of our time and service; but it does mean that we need to separate our lives apart from the ministry and not use the ministry facilities (internet, phone, vehicles) to be conducting personal business. Students are well aware when personal interest of staff comes before the ministry.
“That favorite subject, Myself.” --James Boswell “There is no smaller package then a man or women wrapped up in him self or her self."
7. Letting Personal Issues and Problems Affect Relationships With Students
All of us are still trying to “work our salvation with fear and trembling.” --Philippians 2:12 However, we should not be working them out at the expense of the students; in other words if in any way our attitude, mood, job performance is adversely affected by the things we’re having to deal with in the walk of sanctification we will do more harm then good to those around us be it students or staff.
“It’s difficult to find common ground with others when the only person you’re focused on is yourself.” My brother David taught that when we’re going through tough times we have to “faith” it—not fake it. We cannot allow our own problems adversely affect our ministry to others. This needs to be done in a way that we don’t put on a phony face but that we bear our hearts, souls and problems with leaders - not with converts that have their own struggles. TC residents have great radar to pick up weaknesses of staff.
"To connect with people, be yourself, at your best." --Chales Wetzel
7 WAYS TO CONNECT WITH STUDENTS
1. Care!
According to John Maxwell people have 3 questions:
“If you want to find common ground with others, the place to begin is with their feelings. If you can connect on an emotional level, connecting is much easier on every other level.”
“People like people that like them.” Working with troubled people over the long haul can drain one physically, emotionally and spiritually. Some call it burn out. One thing that needs to be guarded above all else is that we not lose our compassion. Once we view students as clients and not sheep we’re called to shepherd we need to either get a rest or move on.
2. Be Real!
Don’t try to be the image of what you think you should be; be yourself as you let Christ shine through your personality, your talents and your giftings.
Being real also means at time being honest and having the capacity for self-criticism. I tell workers, “When you’re able to tell a student I was wrong when you were wrong; you will gain respect, not lose it. Paul said, “Put on the Lord Jesus Christ.” He did not say “put on” someone you are not. If you’re a new staff and you don’t know something admit it. If you make a mistake confess it!
“To connect with people, be yourself, at your best.”
A word of caution: there is a difference between being real and being raw. In being ourselves we can go overboard using language that we thing is smart but is unwise. When leaders correct you for some of the ways you talk or deal with students they think is unwise; beware of the excuse “well that’s just the way I am.” Sometimes the way we “am” is not helpful but harmful. “People may not always remember what you said or what you did, but they will always remember how you made them feel.”
3. Relax!
Keeping composure in tense and pressured situation brings calmness to others. Students take on the attitude of the staff. Being relaxed does not mean being lazy; it means having “the peace of God that passes all understanding.” In other words you may not understand a situation or have the right answers in all circumstances’ that come up; but if you maintain a quiet and gentle spirit it will calm a tense situation. David the Psalmist wrote in Psalms 16:9 "…my flesh also shall rest in hope.”
Oh how I wish I had rested more in the Lord as a younger leader. Maybe peacefulness’ comes with age; but it can also come with maturity and older people are not necessarily mature by the fact they are older. Some people give off tension by the way they carry themselves. If you think you may be doing this ask a leader if you make others feel your tension. Maybe you’re trying too hard. Maybe you are blind to being too stern, too legalistic, to much a cop and not enough like a caring mother or father.
God is not a hard taskmaster.
Gentleness is a fruit of the Spirit.
Jobs “comforters” often gave bad advise, but here is one good bit of advice they gave: “And you would be secure because there is hope…and take your rest in safety.” Rest is not something we can only do when not on duty - we can work restful.
Psalms 16:9 “Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices; my flesh shall rest in hope.” Here is a word for some reading this: relax. Calm down! Be at peace! If you carry the weight of the students, the program and your assignment all on your shoulders then you will be crushed by this burden. Playing god is impossible!
4. Use Humor Properly!
Humor can be used improperly and sometimes humor is a form of anger; however, a soft and sometimes humorous answer can turn away wrath. There is a time to laugh!
You are never fully dressed until you wear a smile! Karl Barth said, “Laughter is the closest thing to the grace of God.” Victor Borge said, “The shortest distance between two people is laughter.” A good and humorous story can teach a valuable lesson especially when it is applied to a biblical truth.
Think of some of the times Jesus may have smiled or laughed at situations. When a child sat on his lap? Did he say something real serious or did He make the child smile - I think it was the ladder. What about when the lad brought 5 loaves and 2 fish to Jesus in a crowd of 5,000? I would have seen humor in that.
Humor in teaching, counseling and even in a tense situation can disarm people and turn a heavy problem into a good teaching moment.
5. Earn Authority!
Using authority properly is one of the greatest challenges for leaders. Having a title or a position may grant the one who has it certain authority but it is a mistake to think that such authority is automatic. After all these years I still don’t know in some situations to use my authority for correction and discipline or for mercy. I think and hope I get it right more often then wrong. The point is that one must exercise authority balanced with grace, patience and wisdom. Someone once wrote a book with the title The Velvet Covered Brick. It was about being firm without being abusive; and being strong in a humble and sensitive manner. The older I get the more aware I am of the need to be wise in how I use authority.
Human nature rebels again authority! If I err I want to error on the side of grace. It’s not about showing who’s in charge; it’s about allowing the Holy Spirit to change a person. When it comes to discipline one-size-does not fit all. Sometimes the best use of authority is to forgive and forget; and to choose to use correction on the right issues. I see too many programs make mountains out of mole hills and then let what I call program felonies treated as misdemeanors.
“The wisest have the most authority." --Plato
What was it that amazed the religious authorities in Jesus day? It was how He used His authority righteously.
6. Be An Encourager!
“Encouragement is the oxygen of the soul." The best staff has the gift of “exhortation” which is the gift of encouraging others. However, if you don’t have the gift resident in you, it’s possible to still be an encourager by choice and by realizing you have a need to manifest this characteristic in your relationships. A good gift mix as far as a staff team is to have someone with the gift of discernment working along side with someone with the gift of mercy and encouragement. I see the gift of discernment exercised all the time without mercy. And I see sometimes encouragement and mercy given without discernment. Encouragement sometimes simply needs to be a smile, a pat on the back, a complement, a thank you or a friendly sit down together with someone.
Every Saul/Paul needs a Barnabus.
Every Onesimus (the runaway slave in the epistle to Philemon) needs a Paul to encourage, instruct and give wise counsel.
Do a Word study on the word “encourage.” You will find that not only should we “encourage one another” but we need to do it up and down the chain of command. In other words it’s not just leaders that should encourage their workers, but workers need to encourage their leaders.
7. Be A Servant!
I see too many ministries and programs where the convert/student is treated as the servant/slave when the leaders should be the servants. “He that would be greatest among you let him be servant of all.” --Matthew 23”11 (Also see I Corinthians 15:58)
Those who work in government are called “public servants.” Some live up to that and some don’t - especially politicians. In the kingdom of God servanthood is or should be the hallmark of every ministry. I’ll take one good servant without much education and without a lot a talent for every ten college students with degrees, knowledge and talents but who do not have the heart of a servant. Someone has said, “The service of servanthood is the rent we pay for a room on this earth.”
“The Lord doesn’t ask about your ability, only your availability; and, if you prove your dependability, the Lord will increase your capability.” --Author unknown
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.
7 COMMON MISTAKES STAFF MAKE WITH STUDENTS
All quotes, unless otherwise stated, are from John C. Maxwell’s book entitled, "Everyone Communicates Few Connect".
What are some of the mistakes I observe staff make with students?
1. Saying The Right Thing In The Wrong Way
Tone of voice is a form of communication. Colossians 4:6 “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” Yes, speech and communication should be pleasant - “seasoned with salt” - not sap. Often we are unaware of our manner of speaking. We must remember we deal with people who come often from backgrounds where the language of families was done in anger; deservedly or not deservedly. We deal with those who are emotionally like children and children need speech “seasoned with salt.”
“If you want people to remember what you say, you need to say the right thing at the right moment in the right way.” In the heat of someone’s disobedience we can react improperly rather then act righteously. The Bible says, “In your patience possess ye your souls”, I take this to mean to have self-control when others may be out of control. Proverbs 10:20, “Good mans talk is like rare silver.” “God has given us two ears, but one tongue, to show that we should be swift to hear, but slow to speak. God has set a double fence before the tongue, the teeth and the lips, to teach us to be weary that we offend with the tongue.” --Thomas Watson
2. Beware Of Robot Relationships
Actually you can’t have a relationship with a robot! These are workers that are on automatic pilot giving orders and instructions without regard to the feelings of others. We should not be like an uncaring clerk in a store or as a stern security guard at the mall trying to demonstrate a tough guy image. “If your face is going to “talk” for you anyway, you may as well have it communicate something positive.”
Use your head to handle yourself, your heart to handle others. A pastor states: “I never realized how many nonverbal mistakes I was making until I saw myself on video. Now it is my regular practice to go back and review myself on tape to determine not only what I said, but how I said it. The tape does not lie.” “People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude.”
I don’t want workers that perform like they can’t wait to get off duty; having no joy, no enthusiasm and no impact on the students. TC is not a job—it’s a calling—a calling that needs to be motivated by love, joy and peace. If you have to keep reminding students that you’re in authority your authority will not be respected. A staff once told me, “tell the students they have to listen to me.” I answered, “I can’t do that! You have to earn the right to be listened to by the way you communicate and connect with the students.”
“More then 90 percent of the impression we often convey has nothing to do with what we actually say.” “What we say accounts for only 7 % of what is believed.” “The way we say it accounts for 38 percent." “What others see accounts for 55 percent.”
As staff the students need to see someone that earns respect by demonstrating a Christ like character and compassion for the students. When this is done it will command authority.
“If you wish to know what a man is, place him in authority.” --Ancient proverb
“Authority without wisdom is like a heavy axe without an edge, fitter to bruise than polish.” --Anne Bradstreet
3. Not Listening
My wife tells me that I don’t always listen to her. At least I think that’s what she said. One of the greatest gifts you can give someone is a little bit of your time to listen to them. Even if what is said is small talk or uninteresting talk; to listen is to show you care. Again my wife instructs me:“You need to not only listen but to appear that you’re listening.” In other words look at her! Good advice for staff with students as well.
Every course I ever took in Bible College prepared me to speak, teach, preach and counsel - not one taught me the importance of listening.
There are 3 levels in listening:
- Listen to what is being said.
- Listen to what is not being said.
- Listen to what someone is unable to say because it’s too painful.
“None so deaf as those who won’t hear.” --Ancient proverb
Larry King the CNN interviewer said, “I never learned anything while I was talking.”
“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak….” --James 1:19
4. Too Busy!
“We aren’t in the coffee business, serving people. We’re in the people business, serving coffee.” --A Coffee shop owner
Teen Challenge is not just in the soul saving business or the business of changing lives; we are in the business (calling) of coming along side residents to be the instrument of grace to help make this happen. The Teen Challenge “program” is not simply the rules, the Bible, the discipline; it’s that for sure but it’s also all about how we serve. The staff makes the program for better or worse.
I always teach that we have 2 curriculums. There is the classroom curriculum and then we the staff are the “other” curriculum; living epistles know and read by all the students for good or for ill. The old quote applies here: “People would rather see a sermon then hear it.” If staff are so caught up in running the “program” without connecting with the students then the program becomes self defeating. We must not be like busy parents that have no time for their children. "Trust is even more important than love." --Jeffrey Gitomer
Ponder these verse from I Kings 10:39-40, Now as the king passed by, he cried out to the king and said, “Your servant went out into the midst of the battle; and there a man came over and brought a man to me, and said, ‘Guard this man; if by any means he is missing, your life shall be for his life, or else you shall pay a talent of silver.” While your servant was busy here and there, he was gone.” Then the king of Israel said to him, “So shall your judgment be, you yourself have decided it.”
My prayer for myself and my staff is that we are not so busy majoring in minors that someone left the program because we were busy, “here and there and he [or she] was gone” and left the program because of our business.
5. Not Understanding How To Use Authority
If you have to keep reminding students that you’re in authority your authority will not be respected. A staff once told me, “tell the students they have to listen to me.” I answered, “I can’t do that! You have to earn the right to be listened to by the way you communicate and connect with the students.” Sometimes the leadership of a ministry does not spell out what lines of authority are. And, its also the case that those who should take authority in certain situations do not do so.
As has already been stated that a staff can be given a title but getting students to respect the authority that goes with the position is something that takes time. In my early days of TC, I was in my early 20’s; I asked a student how he was doing. “Not good,” he answered. “Why?” I asked. “I am having trouble taking orders from you. I’m a grown man in my 40’s and you’re just a kid.” I said, “You got it wrong. I am 20 years older then you. Around here we go by spiritual age not biological age.” He smiled and accepted that. Some students will always try to be intimidating and like a child or teenager see how far they can get away with things. The misuse of authority only creates more rebellion. The spirit of the age is individualism taken to an extreme resulting in rebellion to any and all authority. Students bring it with them into the program. Facing it is one of the biggest ‘challenges’ of Teen Challenge. It takes a very wise and humble staff to earn the right to be respected for the authority they have to use.
Finding the middle ground between law and grace, tough love and sloppy love---is not acquired easily. Know yourself! Are you soft in your personality; acquire toughness. Are you stern by nature and personality; ask God to give you more mercy and grace.
6. Preoccupation With Your Own Self-Interest
There can be two kinds of business: being too busy with ministry duties that take us away from the main thing we’re all about---helping others; and busy with personal things on the ministry clock. One of the things I hate to hear is, “I’m not on duty now.” As a pastor, father, husband I am always “on duty.” This does not mean we allow our leaders or students to take advantage of our time and service; but it does mean that we need to separate our lives apart from the ministry and not use the ministry facilities (internet, phone, vehicles) to be conducting personal business. Students are well aware when personal interest of staff comes before the ministry.
“That favorite subject, Myself.” --James Boswell “There is no smaller package then a man or women wrapped up in him self or her self."
7. Letting Personal Issues and Problems Affect Relationships With Students
All of us are still trying to “work our salvation with fear and trembling.” --Philippians 2:12 However, we should not be working them out at the expense of the students; in other words if in any way our attitude, mood, job performance is adversely affected by the things we’re having to deal with in the walk of sanctification we will do more harm then good to those around us be it students or staff.
“It’s difficult to find common ground with others when the only person you’re focused on is yourself.” My brother David taught that when we’re going through tough times we have to “faith” it—not fake it. We cannot allow our own problems adversely affect our ministry to others. This needs to be done in a way that we don’t put on a phony face but that we bear our hearts, souls and problems with leaders - not with converts that have their own struggles. TC residents have great radar to pick up weaknesses of staff.
"To connect with people, be yourself, at your best." --Chales Wetzel
7 WAYS TO CONNECT WITH STUDENTS
1. Care!
According to John Maxwell people have 3 questions:
- “Do you care for me?”
- “Can you help me?”
- “Can I trust you?”
“If you want to find common ground with others, the place to begin is with their feelings. If you can connect on an emotional level, connecting is much easier on every other level.”
“People like people that like them.” Working with troubled people over the long haul can drain one physically, emotionally and spiritually. Some call it burn out. One thing that needs to be guarded above all else is that we not lose our compassion. Once we view students as clients and not sheep we’re called to shepherd we need to either get a rest or move on.
2. Be Real!
Don’t try to be the image of what you think you should be; be yourself as you let Christ shine through your personality, your talents and your giftings.
Being real also means at time being honest and having the capacity for self-criticism. I tell workers, “When you’re able to tell a student I was wrong when you were wrong; you will gain respect, not lose it. Paul said, “Put on the Lord Jesus Christ.” He did not say “put on” someone you are not. If you’re a new staff and you don’t know something admit it. If you make a mistake confess it!
“To connect with people, be yourself, at your best.”
A word of caution: there is a difference between being real and being raw. In being ourselves we can go overboard using language that we thing is smart but is unwise. When leaders correct you for some of the ways you talk or deal with students they think is unwise; beware of the excuse “well that’s just the way I am.” Sometimes the way we “am” is not helpful but harmful. “People may not always remember what you said or what you did, but they will always remember how you made them feel.”
3. Relax!
Keeping composure in tense and pressured situation brings calmness to others. Students take on the attitude of the staff. Being relaxed does not mean being lazy; it means having “the peace of God that passes all understanding.” In other words you may not understand a situation or have the right answers in all circumstances’ that come up; but if you maintain a quiet and gentle spirit it will calm a tense situation. David the Psalmist wrote in Psalms 16:9 "…my flesh also shall rest in hope.”
Oh how I wish I had rested more in the Lord as a younger leader. Maybe peacefulness’ comes with age; but it can also come with maturity and older people are not necessarily mature by the fact they are older. Some people give off tension by the way they carry themselves. If you think you may be doing this ask a leader if you make others feel your tension. Maybe you’re trying too hard. Maybe you are blind to being too stern, too legalistic, to much a cop and not enough like a caring mother or father.
God is not a hard taskmaster.
Gentleness is a fruit of the Spirit.
Jobs “comforters” often gave bad advise, but here is one good bit of advice they gave: “And you would be secure because there is hope…and take your rest in safety.” Rest is not something we can only do when not on duty - we can work restful.
Psalms 16:9 “Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices; my flesh shall rest in hope.” Here is a word for some reading this: relax. Calm down! Be at peace! If you carry the weight of the students, the program and your assignment all on your shoulders then you will be crushed by this burden. Playing god is impossible!
4. Use Humor Properly!
Humor can be used improperly and sometimes humor is a form of anger; however, a soft and sometimes humorous answer can turn away wrath. There is a time to laugh!
You are never fully dressed until you wear a smile! Karl Barth said, “Laughter is the closest thing to the grace of God.” Victor Borge said, “The shortest distance between two people is laughter.” A good and humorous story can teach a valuable lesson especially when it is applied to a biblical truth.
Think of some of the times Jesus may have smiled or laughed at situations. When a child sat on his lap? Did he say something real serious or did He make the child smile - I think it was the ladder. What about when the lad brought 5 loaves and 2 fish to Jesus in a crowd of 5,000? I would have seen humor in that.
Humor in teaching, counseling and even in a tense situation can disarm people and turn a heavy problem into a good teaching moment.
5. Earn Authority!
Using authority properly is one of the greatest challenges for leaders. Having a title or a position may grant the one who has it certain authority but it is a mistake to think that such authority is automatic. After all these years I still don’t know in some situations to use my authority for correction and discipline or for mercy. I think and hope I get it right more often then wrong. The point is that one must exercise authority balanced with grace, patience and wisdom. Someone once wrote a book with the title The Velvet Covered Brick. It was about being firm without being abusive; and being strong in a humble and sensitive manner. The older I get the more aware I am of the need to be wise in how I use authority.
Human nature rebels again authority! If I err I want to error on the side of grace. It’s not about showing who’s in charge; it’s about allowing the Holy Spirit to change a person. When it comes to discipline one-size-does not fit all. Sometimes the best use of authority is to forgive and forget; and to choose to use correction on the right issues. I see too many programs make mountains out of mole hills and then let what I call program felonies treated as misdemeanors.
“The wisest have the most authority." --Plato
What was it that amazed the religious authorities in Jesus day? It was how He used His authority righteously.
6. Be An Encourager!
“Encouragement is the oxygen of the soul." The best staff has the gift of “exhortation” which is the gift of encouraging others. However, if you don’t have the gift resident in you, it’s possible to still be an encourager by choice and by realizing you have a need to manifest this characteristic in your relationships. A good gift mix as far as a staff team is to have someone with the gift of discernment working along side with someone with the gift of mercy and encouragement. I see the gift of discernment exercised all the time without mercy. And I see sometimes encouragement and mercy given without discernment. Encouragement sometimes simply needs to be a smile, a pat on the back, a complement, a thank you or a friendly sit down together with someone.
Every Saul/Paul needs a Barnabus.
Every Onesimus (the runaway slave in the epistle to Philemon) needs a Paul to encourage, instruct and give wise counsel.
Do a Word study on the word “encourage.” You will find that not only should we “encourage one another” but we need to do it up and down the chain of command. In other words it’s not just leaders that should encourage their workers, but workers need to encourage their leaders.
7. Be A Servant!
I see too many ministries and programs where the convert/student is treated as the servant/slave when the leaders should be the servants. “He that would be greatest among you let him be servant of all.” --Matthew 23”11 (Also see I Corinthians 15:58)
Those who work in government are called “public servants.” Some live up to that and some don’t - especially politicians. In the kingdom of God servanthood is or should be the hallmark of every ministry. I’ll take one good servant without much education and without a lot a talent for every ten college students with degrees, knowledge and talents but who do not have the heart of a servant. Someone has said, “The service of servanthood is the rent we pay for a room on this earth.”
“The Lord doesn’t ask about your ability, only your availability; and, if you prove your dependability, the Lord will increase your capability.” --Author unknown
--Don Wilkerson
President, Teen Challenge Inc.